


Redd

by BirbandBairn (Shinpoko)



Category: A Hat in Time (Video Game)
Genre: Action, Drama, Family Drama, Parent-Child Relationship, Violence
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-18
Updated: 2018-09-21
Packaged: 2019-07-14 02:23:39
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 18
Words: 25,340
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16031021
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Shinpoko/pseuds/BirbandBairn
Summary: The Conductor has a long train ride a head of him.  Three strange customers bought all the seats on the train and demanded minimal crew, Leia's been a handful and he's got a sinking suspicion his unwelcome brother Redd might make an appearance.





	1. It was a dark and storm night

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Trouble is storming

The hot muggy night air hug over the dark buildings of the marshside city of Bittern. The power for a great portion of the city had been knocked out from a storm the day before. Unfortunately, the brief relief from storm weather was not to last. Dark clouds already threatened hot rain and the taste of atmosphere tainted each breath anyone foolish to be outside took. 

The storm damage was particularly bad around Bittern University. There had been some intense wind damage done to many of the main buildings and several power lines were down around the science buildings in particular.

What happened next didn’t help the state of affairs much.

A bright flash illuminated the main quad as a small explosion rocked several buildings. Several windows on the top floor of the Pedology building were blown out just as a dark figure took a running leap through one of them.

Trying their best not to end up a sticky red pile of goo, they managed to grab onto one of the wind damaged trees next to the building and swiftly scurried down the tree.

Bolting across the quad, the figure made it around fifty feet before a set of sharp talons latched onto the back of their head and slammed them into the ground. A medium sized box flew out of the figure’s coat and skidded across the cobblestones. 

The figure felt the talons release their hold on their skull and the sound of wings start to beat. Reaching up, the figure grabbed the bird before it could take off and tried to slam them to the ground as hard as they could.

They were rewarded with a surprised squawk and a small, comical puff of feathers. 

Forcing themselves to their feet, the figure lunged toward the box, determined to get it away from the other bird.

But before they could grab it, a dark blur shot just in front of their hands; snatching up the box and dashing down the street.

Turning their lunge into a roll, the figure sprung to their feet and made to run after the dark blur only to be smacked with the full force of a pissed off goose wing. 

Shaking their head, they tried to stumble after the bird. 

A bright flash of lightning streaked across the sky and the following roar of thunder knocked the prone figure to the ground. Giving in, they waited for their head to stop pounding.

 _Great,_ they thought. _Fan-pecking-tastic_. 

Another flash of lightning lit up the darked quad. A flash of gold caught the stunned bird's eyes. In amongst the ring of feathers knocked from the flying assailant, a small piece of gold stuck out amongst the fluff.

With great effort, the bird made their way over to the feather ring. Digging around, they pulled out what felt like a rectangle piece of paper. Rummaging around in their pocket, they pulled out a small flashlight. 

It was a ticket for the Owl Express with the departure date was listed for tomorrow afternoon. 

Just great.

A low rumble echoed throughout the dark quad followed by the first heavy drops of rain. 

Making their way back to the science building, the figure hid undercover from the storm and pulled out a long range walkie-talkie.

“Rick, taking your car. Over.”

“... Nugh, Redd? What did you do?” The voice over the radio sounded dazed, like it had been dealing with a massive headache.

“I know where those peck necks are taking the shard and I’m going after them. Over and out.”

“Wait! Redd-”

Redd turned off the walkie-talkie and took off towards the university parking lot. If he could get on the train before those bastards could, he might be able to get the shard back before the Conductor even knew he was there. That meant heading to his brother’s beloved studio. If he was lucky, only his brother would be there.

An image of a small ball of soft orange feathers wrapped in a blanket popped into his mind. 

Redd’s heart skipped a beat. 

No, surely his brother wouldn’t be stupid enough to drag an owlet to a studio or on a long train ride. He wasn’t that irresponsible. 

Ignoring the nagging doubt in the back of his mind, Redd found his old friend Rick’s car, picked the lock, hotwired the ignition and took off into the stormy night.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The start of one of the longest stories I ever wrote. I was really terrified to write and post this but thanks to the support of some friends, I did it and I still can't believe I managed it. This is a follow up to a 16 page comic called Hatching on my blog and you can see more at birb-and-bairn.tumblr.com


	2. A battle of wills

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Grooves has to deal with a battle of wills.

The following afternoon, several hundred miles away from Bittern in a studio surrounded by desert, the lunch bell rang loud throughout the building and an intense battle of wills began.

Dj Grooves had a long history of dealing with difficult birds and was no stranger to manipulation. He had dealings with corrupt politicians, had gotten the mafia to stay far away from any of his crew and dealt with the feathered timebomb on a daily basis. This standoff should be no problem for the large penguin with magnificent eyebrows. His opponent, however, was one and didn't give two flight feathers about any of that.

So Grooves,sitting at his desk, with his tuna fish sandwich halfway up to his beak, tried desperately to ignore the little fledgling.

Leia stared at Grooves with wide eyes, her tiny hands placed carefully on the desk. Still being relatively small, her head only barely made it to the edge of the desk so she had tactfully rested her chin on the wood. The overall effect was that of a small feathered puppy begging for food.

Grooves moved to take a bite of his sandwich. Out of the corner of his eye, he noticed Leia’s eyes move briefly to the sandwich and a subtle smacking of her beak. He lowered it and her eyes went back to his face. Somehow, her eyes had gotten even more doe eyed.

“FINE Darling! You can have my sandwich!” Grooves exclaimed, exhausted and fed up. 

“Yehs!!” Leia yelled triumphantly, snagging the sandwich from Groove’s hands. Grinning with genuine pleasure, she took a huge bite.

“Doesn’t your _father_ feed you?” Grooves asked grumpily. 

“Yehs! But no fishie,” Leia replied through a mouth full of tuna fish sandwich.

“You like fish?”

“Yehs!” Leia replied happily, spraying crumbs everywhere.

Grooves grimaced and brushed off some of the crumbs off his coat.

“Look, you should go before the Condu-” 

“LEIA?! WHERE DID YE GET OFF TAE??” A voice boomed down the hallway.

“Never misses a cue, does he?” Grooves grumbled.

“Cnductor!” Leia squeaked out happily. “Bye Mista ‘Ooves! ‘Nks fer ta samich!”

“Bye Darlin,”Grooves sighed.

After Leia had bolted out of the room, Grooves turned back to the rest of his lunch. Without the sandwich there wasn’t much left. With a heavy sigh, he opened a drawer and pulled out some instant dinners.

“So much for eating healthier,” he grumbled.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi Grooves! Bye Grooves! This is really his only appearance in this chapter. He does somewhat get along with the little Leia, tho that doesn't stop her from stealing his tuna fish sandwiches.


	3. Offski

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Leia finds the Conductor and the pair head off towards the train, Redd snoops around, and a gift turns out to be not as expected.

Shoving the rest of the sandwich in her mouth, Leia bolted down the dressing room lined hall. Ducking under some costumes and climbing up boxes, she made her way to the last place she had left her dad. As much as she loved being at the studio with him, she did not like being left alone with the express owls and would take any opportunity to sneak off and do her own thing. 

Spotting the Conductor’s back, Leia skidded behind him and took a huge breath.

“CNDUTOR!!” She yelled happily. 

The Conductor jumped, his feathers puffing out slightly.

“Leia!! How many times do Ah need tae tell ye not tae run off?!”

Ignoring his question, Leia smugly trotted over and grabbed his hand.

“Prk?” She asked innocently.

“Wha- No, we ain’t going tae the park,” the Conductor replied, a little confused. “Why would ye think that, Lass?”

“Want to!” Leia explained. 

“Ah, well, not today, OK,” the Conductor sternly replied.

Kneeling down, he motioned to Leia to get on his back. Excitedly, Leia jumped on. Getting piggyback rides were the best way to get around in little Leia’s mind.

As they traversed Dead Bird Studio, Leia babbled on in incoherent sentences about her adventures. Here and there and actual word would make it in but overall, Leia was still figuring out how to master speech beyond a few words. The Conductor nodded along and tried to make the appropriate comments at the right times to encourage her to keep at it, just as all the books on raising hatchlings had said. BUT, in reality, he had no real idea what she was going on about.

Once they were in the elevator heading up to the main floor, Leia started asking questions. Those were a little harder to fake his way through but, heck, was the Conductor going to try.

“‘Nd ah doshna yer wanning ‘nd cranny?”

“-Ah’m not sure Lass.”

“But Cndutor! Dun ab- ab-” Leia stopped, struggling to find the words.

“It’s alright Lass, when we get on me train, Ah’ll get you some crayons and paper and you can try tae draw it out.”

Slightly frustrated, Leia sulked before asking another question.

“‘ome?”

“No, we ain’t going home. Ah told ye last night, we’re gonna be on me train for a few days,” the Conductor replied with relief. 

With a ding, the elevator doors opened and the two of them headed towards the small train station the Conductor had set up next to the studio.

“Oh! Ma!” Leia exclaimed happily.

“No, not Ma! Why do ye keep callin me train Ma?!” It was the Conductor’s turn to sulk as he quickly moved towards the double doors leading to his train.

Leia, with the instincts of toddlers everywhere, latched on to this the perfect chance to have some fun.

“Ma! Ma! Ma! Ma! Ma! Ma! Ma! Ma! Ma! Ma! Ma! Ma! Ma! Ma! Ma! Ma! Ma!” She chanted with glee. 

“UGH, Leia… Did Grooves tell you tae call me train that?”

“... No?”

“AHA! AH KNEW IT!” He exclaimed smugly before clearing his throat. “Anyway, Lass, Ah’ve got a gift fer you!”

“Yeehs!! Gift gift gift!” 

As the two of them chattered their way across the station, Redd watched them from his hiding place in the station. He had driven all night, almost wrecked the car and barely snuck in without being detected. Sure the receptionist would have a huge headache later but nothing too bad. Leaning back against the wall, he let out a loud groan.

“Uuuuggggghhhhh, why?” He asked the heavens. “This whole year has been a whole pile of rotten luck.”

Continuing to grumble about his fate, Redd carefully, snuck around, trying hard not to catch the attention of either birds. Climbing up on some boxes stacked up next to the entrance to the employee break room, Redd carefully maneuvered his way to some of the building’s scaffolding, got himself right over the caboose car and dropped down. Lying on his stomach, incase anyone happened to walk by, he started looking for the emergency hatch.

His search didn’t last long. The distinct sound of a diesel engine in the distance immediately grabbed his attention. Poking his head up over one of the decorative metal feathers of the train, Redd scanned the distance. A small, white van covered with dried mud was leaving a large trail of dust behind it as is tore across the desert landscape. It took a sharp turn off of the desert and onto the paved road leading to the studio. Swerving into the parking lot, the van came to a stop and three figures climbed out and headed toward the train station entrance. 

Redd’s face darkened. _So they decided to change their plans, huh? Not that it would matter much. Though with Leia here…_

Redd gritted his teeth. Even having _him_ on the same train as _his_ kid was making his blood boil. He wasn’t getting her too.

In the control room, the Conductor buttoned the last button on the little suit and straighten the tiny tie. He took a step back to admire the result. Leia was now adorned in a miniature version of the Conductor’s own attire, a black fitted two piece suit with gold buttons, with a white undershirt, a floral lavender colored tie and a pair of classy black shoes. The outfit was topped off with a black fiddler cap with black braiding and gold buttons.

“Perfect!!” He exclaimed.

Leia, confused, sniffed her right sleeve before nibbling it.

“Ahh Lass, ye look perfect fer your first long train ride,” the Conductor said, choking up a little. “Ah’m so proud!”

“...gift?”

“That's it, Lass,” the Conductor replied, turning around to mess with the train controls and check paperwork.

“‘weatter?” Leia asked, a little annoyed as she tried to move around in her new clothes.

“Ye can have yer sweater back after the ride. There are some pretty important birds riding today. They paid me a lot of money tae make this trip. Bought every seat and-”

“No,” Leia said, with her shoulders hunched and arms crossed.

“Leia-”

“No! No! NO!” She chanted as she tried to get one if the shoes off her feet.

“ **SIGH** Why did Ma and Pa have tae go on vacation this week?” the Conductor muttered, defeated.

Outside the heavy oak doors separating the control room from the cafeteria, the only two of the express crew unfortunate enough to be stuck on duty for this trip sat at the bar. They had the unfortunate luck of being the two always stuck on Leia babysitting duty as well as the ones inevitably blamed for whatever went wrong as a result. This time, however, they were stuck with taking care of the rest of the train as well. Apparently, whoever bought all the tickets had also requested minimal crew.

The loud argument between Leia and the Conductor waffled through the door:

“Leia! Put your shoes back on!”

“No! No! No!”

Steve, the taller of the two, groaned.

Jim, a slightly smaller owl, nudged him in the side. 

“Hey, want to spend this trip getting completely smashed?”

Steve, without even glancing over, popped open two beers.

“Waaaay ahead of you.”

Outside the train, Redd watched his hated targets closely. They had broken through the locked door, smacked the receptionist down when he tried to stop them and proceed on without breaking a sweat.

The trio walked over to the train and forced open the door to the second car without a second thought, leaving the door slightly off its hinges.

For a moment, Redd would give anything to see the look on his brother's face when he found out. And the ways he’d probably try to murder them for harming his precious train. Snapping out of this lovely daydream, Redd got back to work getting in.

Jim and Steve jumped when they heard the crunch of the door being forced open, spilling their beers. Frantically, they tried to clean up the mess before the Conductor came to investigate the noise. As such, neither were fully aware when the trio passed by.

In the control room, the Conductor was fighting a losing battle.

“Leia! Keep yer clothes on!” He yelled as the struggling little owlet tried to get out of the restrictive clothing and he tried to keep it on her.

“NO!”

“Leia- Ah swear Ah’ll get ye something nice later if ye keep-”

“Aah, The Conductor, I presume?” A calm but off putting voice interjected.

The Conductor turned slowly toward the door, still holding the struggling and cheesed Leia; his face going from a frustrated frown to a forced grin.

In the doorway stood a four foot tall dumpy looking gray cat with a large patch of white over his right eye. His large, puffy fur lined ears popped out on either side of a thread bare faded black bowler hat and he was dressed in a light olive green suit cut just tight enough that it didn’t restrict his movements but made his body look tiny compared to his head. The overall effect was like someone putting a plush toy cat’s head on the body of a human doll. It was both comical and slightly unnerving.

On either side of the cat stood two birds. The one on his left was a tall, intimidating peacock. He wore a pair of dark sunglasses over his eyes. His large wings were crossed over a finely tailored waistcoat and his feather train moved gracefully in behind him before the door shut. He gave a cursory look around the room before looking pointedly at the Conductor.

The other, perhaps most terrifying of all, was a white goose. A non-anthropomorphized goose with a tiny sky blue bowtie and small goose sized sunglasses.

“I hope we’re not intruding,” the cat continued. “You do seem to be engaged with some pressing matters.”

“AHh, Mr. Shorthair! Ah thought Ah was picking you up at the Wormwood station!” The Conductor said with forced cheeriness as Leia growled in his arms.

“There was a rather unfortunate change in plans.”

“…So you just decided tae show up at me studio. Great!” The Conductor’s forced grin stretch even farther up his face. His left eye started to twitch.

“Is that a problem, Conductor?” Mr. Shorthair commented dryly.

“Nope! Not at all!” The Conductor retorted, his voice clearly starting to crack. In his mind, he chanted 300,000 pons ad nauseum to calm the slow build up of rage.

“Hmm, indeed,” Mr. Shorthair brushed some dirt off his sleeve. “Well, if you would kindly show us to our rooms, we’ll get settled in and you can get your little locomotive started.”

“Right, of course! This way,” the Conductor moved quickly in case his strained cheeriness facade snapped at an inopportune moment.

Still holding the rather upset Leia, who had only stopped chanting ‘no’ at the sight of the deadly quiet goose, the Conductor lead the trio out into the dining car. Glancing over at the two express owls still desperately trying to hide their spilled beers, he let out a low growl, making a mental note to dock their pay later.

Leia squirmed in his arms and he had an even better idea. Taking a small detour he sat Leia down on a barstool next to them.

“You two! Take care of Leia! And no drinking.”

Not waiting for an answer, the Conductor turned back to Mr. Shorthair.

“This way, this way,” the false cheerfulness oozing back into his voice.

Once the Conductor and the trio of dangerous looking individuals had gone, Jim turned and glared at Leia.

“Just great. We have to watch the little terror.”

Leia flinched back and growled.

“Eh, figured as much when Old Saw Beak brought the little brat on board,” Steve grumbled, pulling out a new beer.

“Still, a two day trip with this orange mess, not ideal,” Jim said reaching over with his foot to spin the barstool Leia was on, resulting with panicked squeaks from Leia as she tried to hold on.

Steve watched in amusement while he formulated a way to keep the little orange brat out of their feathers. He felt his gaze drawn to an old ticket puncher that was kept out as a bit of old time decoration. He grinned as an idea crossed his mind.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Dun dun dunnnn


	4. Cat and Bird

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cat and Bird, ticket scam, and a trip down memory lane

The Conductor unlocked the door to the Dodo Suite and pushed the door open.

“Here we are! One of the best Suites on me train! And, Ah’ve got the keys fer the adjacent room fer ye, as requested,” the Conductor announced pridefully.

Mr. Shorthair nonchalantly strolled into the room, his paws behind his back. The other two strutted in, clearly not impressed.

“Mmm, this will do. I assume we will have the only keys?” Mr. Shorthair questioned while staring out the window.

“Other than my own master set, yes. And be sure, that’s not leaving my pocket.”

“Mmm, I see. We will set off for Las Vanellus without delay,” Mr. Shorthair stated, trying to leave no room for argument.

“AC-tually,” The Conductor snidely retorted, “We still need to stop at the Wormwood station to pick up my breakman and backup engineer.”

Mr. Shorthair glared at the Conductor’s reflection in the window.

“I thought I said you were to have minimal staff.”

“Aye, and Ah am. Usually, Ah donna need a breakman or a backup engineer. **BUT** since this isn’t a trip Ah make that often and usually Ah would have a much larger staff, Ah need tae pick up this one. The two staff Ah have on board, while useful fer train upkeep, don’t have the training fer actually operating the train. So, unless you want tae stop fer the night and extend yer ride by two days, we’re stopping at Wormwood,” the Conductor smugly countered.

Shorthair turned around and glared at the Conductor. The Conductor returned it with one of his own.

“… Fine. But this stop better not take too long.”

“Oh? Any particular reason why?”

Shorthair’s eyes narrowed further.

“Is there a problem?”

“… No, Conductor. If you don’t mind, we need to settle in.”

“Right, right, Ah’ll check in with you later then,” the Conductor quickly stepped out of the room and closed the door behind him. Everything about Mr. Shorthair was pissing him off. Trying to boss _him_ around on _his_ train. If it wasn’t for the money, he’d have them thrown out.

The Conductor took off towards the control room. He had to make a call and get the train moving.

“So you get what you have to do?” Steve asked Leia. They had moved to the rec room to stay out of the way of the Conductor and the guests. Leia held her new hat nervously in her hands and Steve and Jim leaned against the pool table.

Leia nibbled on the brim of her hat.

“Twkts?”

“Very good!” Jim said condescendly. “And how many passengers do you need to get tickets from?”

“Four?”

“Good, good! And we’ll give you a whole bag of cookies once you bring back all four ticket stubs.”

“Really?” Leia looked at them with distrust.

“Cross our hearts. You bring us four ticket stubs, we’ll give you the cookies,” Steve said with false sincerity.

Leia looked down at her feet, deep in thought before looking up at Steve with a determined look in her eyes. She thrust her right hand towards him.

“Deel!”

Smirking, Steve shook her hand.

“Now get out there and get those tickets! Make your dad proud.”

With that, Leia put her hat on her head and took off through the door.

Jim looked over to Steve. “There are only three passengers on this trip, right?”

“Yep,” Steve held up a key and a stack of newspapers, “Let’s go lock ourselves in the sauna and look for new jobs.”

Redd felt the train move just as he had managed to get the emergency hatch open and slip into the caboose. So much for getting the shard and jumping off before they got moving.

Looking around the old caboose, he felt nostalgia hit him in the pit of his stomach. Last time he was here, it was to leave Leia behind and he didn’t have the luxury to look around. It really hadn’t changed from when he was a kid.

Redd ran his hands over the various controls and panels. Each was as he remembered them. There was even the dent in the side of the phone stand from the time when he and Gregg got in a wrestling match. A smile crossed his beak. That was the first time all four of them had been allowed on the train without a babysitter. What a mistake that was. Between the four of them, they had managed to get not only to steal most of the train’s best snacks, he and Walter had somehow managed to set off the train’s self destruct mode.

Good times, Redd thought to himself, chuckling softly.

Redd’s trip down memory lane continued as he entered the next car. The various bookshelves still held many of his favorite books that he would act out with Walter and—-?!

Redd stopped and shook his head. It was happening again. The Conductor hadn’t always been “The Conductor,” he had been his brother first. But with every passing day, it was becoming harder and harder to remember his actual name. It wasn’t like he was forgetting it, it was like something was writing it out of his mind. Sometimes Redd wondered if the Conductor even remembered it.

The interfering thoughts snapped Redd out of his nostalgia trip. He had a mission. If he wanted to fix everything, he needed to focus.

“Right, I just need to find the box, avoid both the insane idiots and the train idiots and get off this high speed death trap,” he muttered to himself. He stepped out from behind the bookcase just as Leia came through the door of the rec room.

_CRAP!_ He yelled internally as he darted back behind the bookcase. _O-kay… Maybe she didn’t see me_.

Redd felt a slight tug on the back of his vest.

“Twkts pwse!” A determined but unsure voice peeped. 

Redd screamed internally.

“Twkts pwse!” The voice repeated, slightly more annoyed.

Taking a deep breath, Redd turned around. His heart skipped a beat and melted. A range of conflicting emotions ran through his brain. This was the first time he had been this close to his little baby since that terrible night a year ago and all he wanted to do was hug her and sob. But also, here she is in a little conductor’s outfit, arm outstretched, asking for tickets, and it is _**the cutest thing in the world.**_

“Sir?” Leia asked, unaware of the conflict going on in the mind of the other bird.

“I-I must have lost mine,” Redd stammered, well aware of the crushed ticket he found on the ground deep in his pocket.

Leia gave him a blank stare. Turning around, she scratched her face and hummed under her breath. After a few seconds, she perked up and spun around with a huge grin on her face.

“If no twkts, candy is accptibble!” She said smugly with both hands out in front of her.

The cuteness of it all brought Redd to his knees like the dramatic bird he was. He covered his ever growing smile with his hand.

_HELP, this is both too cute and too much like her mother_ , Redd plead to the heavens.

“Wait can you take after someone you’ve never met?” He muttered to himself.

“Seeriously sir! Candy or get off Cndutor’s train!” Leia barked.

“That’s the Conductor tho,” Redd concluded.

“Cannnndy!”

“Alright, alright! But I know a way to get you a lot more than candy.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Memorrrrieeeessss, they cut like a knifeeeeeee~ Wait, that's not how that goes?


	5. Gregg

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Conductor makes a call.

The Conductor finished setting the last of the controls to auto. Pulling out of the station had been easy enough, the boilers were running fine and there was no explosion or screaming meaning Leia was probably not causing trouble. Sitting back in his chair, he let out a heavy sigh and took in a moment of quiet beauty. The wide open desert spread out in front of the train, and the midday sun shone bright through patches of clouds and the only sounds were the subtle hum of the various machines and the wheels on the tracks.

“Right! Back to work!” The Conductor swiveled the chair around and hopped out of it.

Walking over to the phone, he pulled out a beaten up address book from his pocket and found Gregg’s work number.

“Ye better pick up,” he muttered into the transceiver as he dialed the number.

Gregg shifted some papers on his immaculate desk while his visitor, a rather scrawny looking crow, squirmed nervously in their seat. Leaning back slightly, looking disinterested in what his visitor was doing, Gregg made some tsk tsk noises under his breath.

The crow tried to sink even further into their seat.

Gregg’s phone rang and without looking up, he reached over, picked up the handset slightly before slamming it down again.

The crow tried to merge with the seat out of pure nervousness.

The phone rang again and Gregg did the same as before, only this time, he flipped to a new page.

The phone rang a third time and Gregg, without looking up, reached around and unplugged it.

“I see you trained in Alpine? Tell me about-”

There was a knock on Gregg’s office door.

“Come in,” Gregg said, slightly annoyed.

“Captain, you’ve got a call,” a tall crow in a gray overcoat reported.

“Sigh, alright, I’ll be right there,” Gregg grumbled. He looked at the applicant.

“I will send in Sergeant Terry to complete this interview. Good luck,” he said with an unfriendly smile.

Gregg pushed passed the crow and stomped over to the phone on the front desk, grumbling the whole time. Taking a deep breath, he picked up the handset.

“Captain Gregg speaking.”

“Ohhh, now ye decide tae pick up,” the Conductor’s angry voice crackled from the receiver.

Gregg hung up the phone.

Thirty seconds later it rang again; the caller id showing the number used for the Owl Express.

Gregg picked it up and before the Conductor could start anything slammed it down once more. Leaning against the desk, he glared at the phone.

A minute passed.

The phone rang again with the same id. Gregg sighed and picked it up.

“Look. I already agreed to do this stupid trip. I still have two hours till you said you’d be at the station. WHAT. DO. YOU. WANT?!” He half yelled into the handset.

Several C.A.W. agents looked up from their desks before very hurriedly ducking back down.

There was a small stretch of annoyed silence from the other end of the line.

“Yer still at the police station so ye still got access tae all yer criminal files and such, right?”

Gregg’s expression darkened.

“Why?” His voice filled with suspicion.

“Weeeell, those clients showed up at me studio unannounced-”

“Conductor. If this is about getting back at someone who pissed you off, I swear.”

“Well if ye’d let me finish, ye peck nec-”

“Oh there goes the phone again.”

“WAIT! WAIT!”

Gregg smiled vindictively. Several C.A.W. agents dove under their desks.

There was a heavy sigh from the receiver.

“Look, there’s something really off about them, alright? These three look like they walked out of a mobster movie. Trust me, Ah’d know.”

“Then why did you agree to take them?” Gregg growled into the phone. At this point, most the C.A.W. agents decided it was time for a brisk run outside, maybe to the other side of town, far away from their beloved captain.

“There was a lot of money involved, OK! And, it’s not like Ah knew what they looked like before hand, they made all the arrangements over the phone!” The Conductor yelled back.

“So they made you an offer you couldn’t refuse?” Gregg groaned, rubbing his eyes.

“… OK, YE donna get tae make those references,” the Conductor snapped, a little annoyed.

“What?” Gregg asked, slightly confused.

“Ugh, nevermind. Anyway, Ah have no idea if they’re involved with anything illegal but the way they’re acting has me worried about the safety of the train and me crew.”

“Bull, yer- YOU are just worried about the train. I’ve never once seen you give one flying feather about any of your crew.”

“Eeeeeh, fair. Ah do care about one member of the crew tho and she most definitely needs to be protected.”

Gregg was about to retort and stopped.

“… You didn’t.”

“Before ye get all annoyed and what not, it’s not like Ah had a choice.”

“You brought Leia?! Why?! I thought you had a sitter?!”

“They all canceled on me! And Ma ‘nd Pa were out on their cruise thing so Ah couldn’t leave her with them.”

“What about that penguin you work with? Couldn’t you call in a favor with him?”

“…Ah would rather die,” the Conductor responded darkly. “Besides, we already left the studio.”

“Conductor. You realize that if these passengers of yours are involved with any sort of organized crime and you do anything that hinders them in any way, they will use her as a way to get at you.”

“Yes Ah get that thank ye very much. Why do ye think Ah called ye?”

“To annoy me,” Gregg said wearily.

“That too. But also tae find more information on these fellows. And tae warn ye so yer not surprised. Speaking of, ye should probably wear yer old uniform from when we use tae work with Pa and bring a weapon just incase.”

“Ugh, right, don’t want to up any tension. In the meantime, get Leia into a safe room and keep her locked up or something. She is way too trusting.”

“Locked up!? She’s not an animal, Gregg.”

“You could have fooled me.”

“Ye know, Ah donna have tae take this.”

There was a click as the Conductor hung up.

“Hmm, must have hit a nerve,” Gregg muttered to himself as he hung up the phone. He counted to five and picked up the phone on the first ring.

“So those descriptions, Conductor,” he said, completely miffed.

“…Shut up.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Gregg is the take-no-crap-from-any-of-you of the brothers. He is fun to write.


	6. Ice cream and daydreams

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Redd spends some time with Leia and Mr. Shorthair dreams a bloody dream.

Back on the train, Redd picked the lock on the door to the small kitchen in the lounge car. With a quiet click, the door sprung open and Redd held it open for Leia who happily bound in. Instantly, she bolted towards a chair, pushing it towards a fridge.

“Hey now, kid! Hold on!” Called Redd.

Leia turned to Redd, giving him a questioning look.

“Am I kicked off the train?”

Leia looked around the kitchen that she now had free reign of. Turning dramatically towards Redd, she gave him a thumbs up.

“Accpepptablblbe.”

The cuteness struck Redd through the heart like an arrow. He staggered back and gripped the edge of the door, his right hand clenching his chest dramatically.

_Help me she’s too cute~!_ He thought lovingly.

“Sir?” Leia asked, concerned.

“I’m fine. Just experiencing the consequences of my life choices.”

“Oh, OK.”

With that, Leia went back to raiding the freezer of every bit of frozen goodness and Redd made his way to a small chair in the corner to sit down and watch. He hadn’t seen any sign of the Conductor roaming around so far or any sign of a babysitter. It was troubling. Even without the murderous trio on board, that couldn’t be safe for a kid.

Redd bit his thumb. He wanted to get the shard and get out as soon as possible but leaving Leia alone, no, he couldn’t do that. Shorthair would take his anger out on her and the Conductor. Well, the Conductor would be fine, probably, but little Leia…

Flashes of memories danced across his mind’s eye; heavy rainfall, hanging from a branch as the two white dots disappearing into the vast darkness below, the silhouette of Shorthair looking down into the chasm for him.

_No_. Redd thought, glaring at the ground. _He’s not getting Leia._

“Sir?”

Redd looked up to find Leia looking at him, her arms filled with ice cream snacks and frozen meat treats.

“Yes?”

Leia shuffled the treats around before pulling out a lizard and mealworm flavored popsicle.

“‘Ere.”

“Wha? Why?”

Leia looked at him and shifted some more treats so she could point at Redd’s face.

“Treats are goood when sad,” she said helpfully.

Redd blinked and raised a hand to his face. _Oh._

“…Thank you,” he said, taking the treat.

Leia nodded her head and plopped down on the floor next to him and dug into her treats.

Redd stared at her in awe; slightly scared of how nonchalant she was around strangers. That cemented it. He had to stick around to make sure she’d stay safe. The Conductor sure wasn’t going to.

Redd ripped open the treat’s wrapper and bit off the top of the popsicle. Guess that also meant that he’d probably have to face off against Shorthair. Great. Maybe he could pick off the other two first so they couldn’t get the jump on him. He didn’t need another goose wing to the ribs.

Lost in his own thoughts, Redd finished his popsicle while the ring of wrappers around Leia grew exponentially.

Leaning his head back against the wall, Redd closed his eyes. The soothing noise and rocking of the train lulled his tired brain and soon, he nodded off.

Mr. Shorthair glared out the window at the passing landscape. It had not been a good past few days. First that traitor turned up and stole the shard from the middle of the main hideout. Then the boss had the gall to suggest he, THE MR. SHORTHAIR needed help retrieving it, only to have the so called help almost lose the traitor again. If he hadn’t stepped in, the shard would still be with those stupid scientist at the university in Bittern. To add insult to injury, the boss even sent those incompetent fools to be his bodyguards. As if he needed them.

He could hear them rummaging around their room next door. The large peacock made a mess of the room before he had managed to chase the silly bird out. And the goose, well, he had no idea what was going on with her. He had no clue what they were up to now but it didn’t matter. As long as he kept the box locked and his possession, those two were expendable tools.

There was the sound of a door opening and closing and then silence from the room next door. The two birds must have left. No matter. He would touch base with them later.

Mr. Shorthair straightened his suit and adjusted his tie. Right, the two of them would be useful, perhaps for keeping an eye on the vexing train conductor. That bird put him on edge. Perhaps it was just the stress from last night but the angry disgrace to raptors reminded him a little too much of the treacherous waste of meat and bone that was Redd.

Redd. Mr. Shorthair’s fur puffed up in rage and he gripped the window sill. After last night, he was sure to make another appearance somehow; that traitor had a nasty habit of showing up at the most inopportune moments. No matter. This time he would be prepared and those two walking snacks wouldn’t get in his way. He’d distract them with some busy work, perhaps having them kill the unnecessary crew for practice. They needed it considering the trouble they had with one scientist.

Mr. Shorthair extended his claws and dug into the wood. A twisted grin spread across his face like vines.

And maybe for a warm up, I’ll see how long the dear conductor would last in a fight, he thought gleefully.

There was a loud ‘fweeeeeeeeeee’ as the train’s whistle rang out; snapping Mr. Shorthair out of his blood filled daydream.

Right, the delivery, Mr. Shorthair pouted. A bloody massacre of the entire train crew would draw too much attention. The boss wouldn’t like that. Still, if Redd did show up, the boss couldn’t fault me for acting accordingly.

The horrible rictus returned to the fluffy gray face.

“Oh do come Redd, I’m waiting for you,” he sang cheerfully under his breath. “With bated breath and a loving hand waiting to rip out your throat.”

Redd’s whole body shivered; a rain of food wrappers fluttered down from his shoulders as he snapped awake.

“Ngghhh!”

“Hmm?” Leia’s head popped out from the middle of a mountain of ice cream and other wrappers.

“Nothing! Nothing, just nodded off,” Redd reassured her.

“‘Kay!” Leia dove back down.

Redd stared at the massive pile of wrappers.

“Uhh, kid? What are you doing?”

Leia’s head popped back up.

“Loooookin fer morrrre candy!” She chirped.

“…More?” Redd stared at her in disbelief.

“Yesh.”

“Uhh, maybe not. You can really eat. Doesn’t —-ngh Doesn’t your dad feed you?” Redd asked, rubbing his head and hating that he had to refer to the Conductor as Leia’s father.

“Why dos evryon ask that?” Leia asked.

“I mean, he is The Conductor, known for his loud rants and short temper. He is rather hard to picture as a father, much less a competent one,” Redd said hastily.

_Though am I really one to talk?_ The treacherous thought blazed across his brain.

Leia stood up the rest of the way; wrappers falling off like autumn leaves. Glaring at Redd straight in the eye, she marched over to him; her hands clenched in fists.

“Cndutr is great Da!” She cried, her voice filled with anger and hurt. “He loves me ‘nd plays with me ‘nd is great!”

Redd leaned back in his chair, startled and a little hurt by her sudden outburst.

“Okay, then why don’t you call him ‘Dad’?” He countered, annoyed. “Must not be all that great if you don’t even give him that.”

Leia’s glare intensified.

“Ah donna like ye annymor,” she stated; her limited vocabulary failing her. Turning around, she walked off in a huff towards the door.

“H-hey wait!” Redd called after her, jumping to his feet and promptly slipping on the mass of wrappers.

Ignoring his calls, Leia stomped through the door and slammed it behind her. Rubbing the tears that had started to form from her eyes, she took off towards the control room. She was gonna show that jerk and give the Condu- HER DAD the BIGGEST hug and start calling him ‘Da’ right now.

Pushing through the lounge doors, Leia trekked over to a small pole, slid down from the tall platform and ran across the strange screen filled room with her eyes screwed shut. She hated this room; the screens always seemed to be watching her.

The door in front of her opened and she ran head first into the bird walking through it. Hitting the floor with a loud ‘meep’ of surprise, her eyes sprang open.

The large white goose glared at her. With several flaps of their wings, they lowered their neck and hissed loudly right in Leia’s terrified face. She could make out every tooth like part on their tongue and bill.

Leia screamed and backed up as fast as she could.

The goose slowly advanced, still aggressively hissing and flapping their wings.

“Mrs. G, that is not very kind,” a tired voice called from behind the aggressive goose.

The large peacock stepped through the door.

“Ah, little… owl, perhaps you can help us? We’ve been looking for assistance but have found no one. This train is not very hospitable,” the peacock casually remarked, placing a wing in front of Mrs. G and scooting her behind him.

Still shaking, Leia nodded her head.

“Good, good! Now, can you take us to a phone we may use? We are rather late informing our employer of our departure.”

Leia nodded her head again and tried to stand up; her legs shaking so bad she fell down again.

The peacock sighed.

“Mrs. G, look what you did,” he said, exasperated. Behind him, Mrs. G snickered in goose.

He held out a wing to Leia.

“Let me help you up, little one.”

Leia took the wing and pulled herself up. She meekly shuffled around the pair, careful to keep facing them at all times, and motioned them through the door.

Redd watched the whole exchange from the lounge door; he had to fight the urge to jump down to tackled the two birds.

_How dare they!_ He fumed. He wanted to jump down there and punch that goose right in the throat. But, with that peacock around as back up… he doubt he could take them both.

Gritting his teeth, Redd took off after them, sticking to the shadows. Best to stalk them till he had a chance to pull Leia away. After all this, he was going to punch his dear brother in the pecking face.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Redd and Shorthair have a bit of a history....


	7. Going from bad...

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which the Conductor hears something blood chilling and Mrs. G does her job.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning! This chapter does have some violence against a small kid in it. Just a heads up.

“…. Ah’m gonna kill him,” the Conductor growled into the phone. Gregg had held him on the line as soon as he had heard Mr.Shorthair’s name and description. Mr. Shorthair, known hitman and random killer. The stuff he had managed to pull up made the Conductor’s blood boil but none more than his connection to Redd.

“Conductor, I didn’t say Redd was still involved with Mr. Shorthair,” Gregg’s voice groaned from the phone’s transceiver. “Only that there are several criminal reports where they both show up.”

“Uh Captain?” A nervous voice in the background called out. “I found that report.”

“Alright. One Moment, Conductor.”

There was the sound of some muffled chatter in the background and the sound of hurried footsteps.

“Uh-huh, yeah. Hmmm,” Gregg’s muffled musing crackled over the deteriorating connection.

“Seems like Shorthair and the other two with him were probably last seen in Bittern. There was a report filed about an attack on a scientist and a civilian at Bittern University last night and the attackers match the three descriptions.”

There was a pause.

“And?” The Conductor asked irritably.

“So about what I said before about Redd-”

“Ah’m gonna kill him.”

“It seems likely he was there,” Gregg continued, ignoring the Conductor’s outburst. “There aren’t too many birds that match his description running around. However, that’s no guarantee that it was him or that he’ll show up again.”

“Oh really? Did yer report also say what happened tae him, hmmm?”

“*Sigh* Conductor, it says someone who looked like Redd disappeared from the scene, BUT again, that doesn’t mean-”

“The report called them attackers right? That means Redd would probably try tae go after them if he could.”

“So? What does that have to do with keeping Leia and yourself safe? Look, you’ve got the information you wanted, use it to keep the little ball of terror safe till you get to Wormwood. I’m going to get the force together and plan a surprise attack at the station.”

“What?! No! no! Ye are not going tae storm me train!”

“Conductor, I am not leaving my brother and niece trapped on a train with a known killer and two wildcards! This is serious! Find Leia, get her and the rest of your crew to the control room and barricade yourselves in. Let us do the rest.”

“Look, if we keep things calm, Ah’m sure we can-”

A scream echoed through the vents up above. The Conductor stopped cold.

“Condu-” Gregg started.

The Conductor slammed the handset down, missing the hook switch, and ran out the door.

“Conductor!? Wait! Don’t do anything stupid!” Gregg’s voice called from the hanging handset.

_If any of those peck necks touch one feather on my little lass’s head there won’t be anything left for Gregg to arrest!_ He thought furiously as he slammed open the door and bolted across the cafeteria.

Skidding across the floor to change his direction, he took off up the stairs in the direction of the VIP rooms. First, he’d check where he had left them, from there, he’d search room by room if he had to.

Growling curses under his breath at the world at large, he tried to focus on being angry. The alternative was being a victim to his overactive and very vivid imagination and succumbing to fear.

 

“What a weird train, I was just saying to Mrs. G! It is very differently on inside than it looks from outside. If you were to tell me that this train had second floor with several rooms branching out every which way and I had been only on outside, I would call you crazy!” The peacock laughed. “What a wonderous way of travel!”

Leia just nodded her head as she lead them to the control room, the only room she really knew of that she was allowed in that had a phone. She couldn’t quite make out whether the peacock was impressed or annoyed with the train. She had never really thought of the train’s layout as anything weird; it was just the train.

Mrs. G honked and grunted a few times.

“Ah, you’re right, Mrs. G! We should ask the Engineer how it all works when he arrives! Or maybe even the conductor bird could be bribed into spilling some peas!” The peacock excitedly replied.

“Ghnonk!” Mrs. G honked and pecked his sleeve.

“No, I am pretty sure it is peas, Mrs. G,” the peacock said confidently.

Leia just stared at the two of them in a mix of morbid fascination and fear as she worked the elevator to get them to the lower level of the train. Hopping off, she motioned to the front of the train. Chattering back and forth, the two larger birds followed the terrified Leia to the control room.

Hope Da is there, Leia thought, not being this scared since she had destroyed that horrible poster. Even though the peacock talked in a friendly way, the way he walked and acted was just as off putting as the entirety of Mrs. G: though Leia couldn’t really put it into words why she felt that way.

Leia sniffed. She wanted her dad; he’d protect her.

As they passed through the cafeteria, the peacock perked up.

“Ah! I know where we are now! So where is the phone?”

Leia pointed to the control room door.

“Perfect!” The peacock clapped his wings together. “Come along, Mrs. G!”

The peacock stepped around Leia and walked through the door. Mrs. G, however, pecked at Leia’s legs, herding her into the control room and preventing Leia from escaping.

Much to Leia’s dismay, when they entered the control room the Conductor was nowhere to be seen.

“Right, time to make my call. Do not worry little one, we will be done soon and you can go run off and be inhospitable elsewhere,” the peacock said with a smile.

He picked up the hanging handset, puting it to his ear before reaching to dial.

Chatter from the police station poured in from the receiver, a loud bird was yelling in the background about mobilizing a squad and various responses of ‘yes captain’ and ‘right away sir’ echoed hollowly.

The smile remained fixed on the peacock’s face but his expression darkened.

“Hmmm… How regrettable,” he muttered before hanging up the handset. “Mrs. G, grab the little one.”

Leia squeaked in terror and tried to run, only for Mrs. G’s wing to catch her hard on the back, slamming her into the wall. Stunned, Leia whimpered as Mrs. G grabbed the back of her collar and dragged her up.

“Sorry little one but we cannot afford to deal with police. We will need you as hostage and negotiation card. I would say we will try not to hurt you more than necessary but we are traveling with a none too stable cat that we have already had to stop from killing several times. We will try but no guarantees,” the peacock said nonchalantly.

There was a distance yell of pain. The peacock sighed.

“See, we leave him for five minutes and he’s already killing someone. No control,” he said, sadly shaking his head.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Mrs. G doesn't care how old you are, she will mess you up. She's a goose and geese are terrifying.


	8. ...to probably also bad

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cat and Bird, round 2, this time with more claws and screaming. And footnotes.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If DnD has taught me anything, it's a lot can happen in 5 minutes.

A Few Minutes Earlier

The Conductor threw open the door to the VIP area. Bolting straight for the Dodo suite, the Condutor fumbled in his pocket for his master set of keys, just in case he needed them. 

“MR. SHORTHAIR!” He yelled, pounding his fist on the door.

There was no response.

Growling under his breath, he pulled out the keys and unlocked the door. Slamming it open, just incase Shorthair was hiding behind the door, the Conductor carefully entered the room, looking around for any sign of the deadly cat.

From above the door, Mr. Shorthair grinned and silently launched himself at the bird’s back, claws extended.

Redd was stuck in the vents when he heard the Conductor scream Shorthair’s name. In an attempt to stay out of sight of the peacock and the goose, he had dove into the ventilation system, which had been his first mistake. The vents were not as big as he had remembered. The second was when he had the bright idea to try and cut them off by traveling through the vents, which were way more windy and maze like then they really should be. He had gotten lost.

He flinched as the Conductor’s voice echoed through the vents and continued to the nearest opening. Knocking out the vent grate, he rolled onto the floor of the balcony seating area of the cafeteria.

That was lucky, he thought.

There was a crash from the VIP room door and a yelp of pain. Redd jumped. The yelp had sounded like the Conductor’s voice. Redd was torn.

As much as he didn’t want to leave Leia alone, if you didn’t know what you were getting into when fighting Shorthair, you wouldn’t last very long.

_Still, it is the Conductor, he should be fine, right?_ Redd reasoned. _That bird’s tough, he can handle a trained mass killer. … Who even I have trouble with._

Redd chewed his thumb.

_No, no. Leia first. Then I can save Mr. I love my train so let’s make the owlet work like an employee._

Redd clenched his teeth, trying to ignore the noises as he watched the door to the cafeteria for signs of Leia.

There was a symphony of crashes and thuds from behind the door; with each sicking note, Redd’s shoulders higher and higher.

The Conductor hit one of the glass divisors with a sickening crack. He hadn’t expected the little furry peck neck to be strong enough to knock him across the room like that. Grimacing, he looked up to see the gray blur charging at him again.

Swearing, he dove out of the way, trying hard not to land on his left arm. The damn cat had really done a number on it; blood was already soaking through several parts of his suit’s sleeve.

He barely had a chance to catch his breath when the gray blur was on him again, biting and clawing at his raised arms.

Mr. Shorthair dug his teeth deep into the Conductor’s arm while swiping at his face with razor sharp claws.

The Conductor screamed in pain followed by a string of swears as he tried to get the cat off his arm. He slammed the cat against the wall repeatedly; flailing his other arm wildly. He was rewarded with several satisfying yowles.The Conductor managed to get one of his feet between Shorthair’s body and his arm, pinned him against the wall; trying to pry him off.

Shorthair finally released the Conductor’s arm when he ran out of breath and was caught with a haymaker to the side of his head. Hitting the ground hard, Shorthair staggered and darted back to recover.

The Conductor glared at the cat.

“Ye ken,” he panted, holding his bleed arm, “if Ah had a knife or several hundred buzz saws, ye’d be dead right now, you peck neck.”

“Mmm, keep acting tough, little snack,” Shorthair purred, a sick grin on his face as he licked the blood from his paws. “I can taste the fear and it is quite nice.”

“…OK, no more talking then,” the Conductor muttered as a chill went up his spine.

The Conductor slowly backed up; keeping his eyes on the cat. There was no way he could survive another attack like that the way things were. He needed a weapon. While a knife or any sharp object would be great, anything to keep the maniac away would be nice. Barring that, putting a door between him and Shorthair would be nice.

The Conductor weighed his options. Could he make it to the door, open it, get through, slam it and lock it before he got ripped to shreds? Would it be better to try than to try and fight him off again? His heart pounded in his ears.

Was this it? The intrusive thought skittered across his mind. His whole body tensed; he need out now. Edging slowly while keeping an eye on Shorthair, he maneuvered himself within better sprinting distance to the door.

Shorthair narrowed his eyes. His plaything wanted to leave and that was unacceptable. Crouching down, placing all four paws on the floor, he prepared to rush the retreating bird.

The world stood still as both bird and cat tensed their muscles.

The Conductor dashed for the door as Shorthair lunged with full force at his back. His hand touched the doorknob as he felt Shorthair’s claws hook into his back.

The world grew dark and distorted, the color and shapes grew blobby, like colored ink in water. The rumbling of the train became both muffled and hollow. The Conductor felt frozen; his hand trapped on the doorknob. He could still feel the claws hooked into his jacket.

The Conductor blinked; it lasted an eternity.

Was this in his head? It felt real.

There was a dark blur and the Conductor felt movement and the relief of pressure from his back.

Just as suddenly as the world had shifted and distorted, it snapped back into focus.

The Conductor stumbled forward into the door, his heart beating like it was trying to escape his chest. A loud yowl and a sickening thud came from behind him.

Spinning around, the Conductor put up his fists, ready to fight whoever joined the fight.

There, standing between the Conductor and the groaning form of Shorthair, dressed in a beaten up dress shirt, vest and torn pants and wearing a ridiculous tinfoil hat and goggles, was Redd.

“… What,” the Conductor momentarily lowered his fists.

“R e d d,” Shorthair growled. “You traitorous sack of flesh and bone, I knew you’d show up again but I didn’t think it would be so soon.”

“What can I say?” Redd said nonchalantly as he lifted the goggles off his eyes. “I run on spite and persistence these days.”

Shorthair hissed and darted at Redd, his vision filled with red.

Redd blurred and the world distorted again and Shorthair responded in kind. Cats had always had weird relationships with the world and had ways of moving around distortions in space and time if they were prepared and Shorthair was no exception. In addition to this, he disappeared from view. Having spent much of his youth with one of the more ruthless sects of the Lazy Paw Gang, Shorthair had picked up some of the finer points of concealment before getting kicked out for being too cruel.

There was a series of blurs as the two charged, attacked, and dodged each other’s attacks.

“What the heck,” the Conductor said, flabbergasted. He hadn’t see a fight like this outside of certain types of cartoons. It was one of the most ridiculous things he had seen since he had first met Grooves. And the worst of it was he couldn’t do anything about it. Whatever Redd was doing, it was preventing the Conductor from doing anything quickly.

He growled under his breath. If there was one thing, other than losing, he hated, it was feeling powerless. If he could just move faster than a few inches per second, he could actually help beat that cat down.

There was a loud crashing noise as Redd and Shorthair launched each other into various bits of furniture and the Conductor could finally move.

Bolting over to Redd, the Conductor helped his brother up.

“Therrre ye go, destroying me train again,” the Conductor quipped. “This is why ye never could work on the train.”

“ ’s not my fault,” Redd mumbled, dazed from crashing into a table. “Walter’s the one who flipped the dorphensmerph…”

Redd’s head drooped down and the Conductor was left holding the weight of the unconscious Redd up.

“If that’s not a concussion, Ah don’t know what it,” the Conductor grumbled. “Best be careful then.”

He slapped Redd in the face. It was a slightly more careful tactic than a punch.

“Wake up ye peck neck! We’re not safe yet, the bloody cat’s still here!”

Shorthair, from across the room, was very slowly getting to his feet. The last blow had knocked the air and the last bit of fight out of him. He leered at the Conductor and the unconscious Redd. Even with Redd out, the other one could still fight enough to cause trouble. Right now, he needed to retreat and recover. Then he could come back and rip Redd’s throat out and throw the other one in front of the train.

The Conductor watched Shorthair carefully as the cat slowly advanced, his feathers puffing up in anger. Carefully, he dropped Redd to the ground and picked up a piece of table. He didn’t know what the cat’s plan was but he’d be plucked and roasted before he’d let that damn cat get away. Sure, his left arm felt like it was on fire and his back felt like a dart board in a bar after a long weekend, but he could deal with that later. He hadn’t found Leia and the biggest threat to her safety was slowing maneuvering himself either to attack or run.

“This ends here, Shorthair,” the Conductor growled, the piece of wood raised like a club.

“Mmm, I think not, my dear Conductor,” Shorthair said through his grin before bolting towards the door.

Swearing, the Conductor dashed forward to intercept him. Swinging the piece of wood like a golf club, the Conductor tried to knock Shorthair away just as the two of them met.

The wood met Shorthair’s body with a meaty thwack. Stunned, Shorthair flew back and hit the wooden door of one of the VIP rooms with a loud crack and slumped down to the floor.

The Conductor stood still, the piece of wood still raised above his head.

Shorthair didn’t move.

He let out the breath he didn’t know he had been holding. Walking over to Shorthair’s limp body, the Conductor checked for a pulse or sign of breathing.

“Yer still alive, huh? Tough little muyrder aren’t ye?” He grumbled once he felt a steady pulse.

Dragging the unconscious cat into the bluebird suite, the Conductor pulled off the cat’s blazer and tie and used the tie to bind Shorthair’s writs behind his back. He then searched the blazer for Shorthair’s wallet. He had a feeling he wasn’t actually going to get paid for this so he might as well see what he could get. It was, after all, in the contract Shorthair had agreed to when he bought the tickets.*

The Conductor pulled a velvet covered box out of one of the pockets. It didn’t look like much other than a nice box with a silver lock. Nor did it weigh much. Setting it aside, he checked the other pockets and found nothing other than balls of lint and bits of string and feathers. Strange that but whatever. He could always check with Gregg to see if there was any reward money for turning Shorthair in.**

Pocketing the box, as a nice little gift for Leia, the Conductor closed and locked the door behind him. He paused and then moved the bits of furniture that hadn’t been destroyed in front of the door. Once it had been satisfactory barricaded, he turned around to tend to his fallen brother.

“Redd, ye idiot…” the Conductor muttered sadly as he checked on his brother’s limp form. “What did ye get messed up in this time?”

Redd hadn’t moved from the spot where the Conductor had dropped him. Slumped against the broken table, the other bird didn’t look too different from the last time the Conductor had seen him. Other than the hat. The hat was new.

The Conductor let out a deep sigh. It was depressing that the only time he ever saw Redd these days was when he was either beaten half to death or running from some trouble he had caused.

He sat down on some of the remains of the table near Redd and. His feelings on Redd were mixed, to put it nicely. While he did want to slug his brother right in the beak for abandoning Leia on the train and then showing up a year later with a murder in tow without even a phone call in the intervening time, the Conductor couldn’t help but feel a twinge of gratitude for Redd saving his life. Then again, he was also sure Redd was to blame for the whole situation.

“Ok, so when ye wake up, Ah’ll thank ya fer stepping in and helping as Ah smack ye on the head,” the Conductor joked out loud. “Then, Ah’ll drag yer butt over tae the first aid kit.”

The Conductor winced as his left arm throbbed.

“Although, Ah get first dibs,” he said as he gingerly touched his left arm.

The sound of approaching voices snapped the Conductor to attention. He didn’t recognize them. Which meant that they were Shorthair’s cronies.

Peck.

Lifting Redd’s body onto his already aching back, the Conductor made a run for the locked second floor room. It was just enough out of the way that if you didn’t know where to look, you wouldn’t find it.

Redd’s ridiculous hat fell off his head and bounced along the ground. Cursing, the Conductor debated on turning around and grabbing it. It had glowed during the fight meaning it must have some power. But, he didn’t have much time as it was and it was better to hide away till he knew what he was up against.

The Conductor unlocked the second floor room and darted inside. Right now, he’d have to hope Redd would wake up soon. On his back, Redd began to snore.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> * The Conductor, in a move to protect his train and his bottom-line, had added an additional terms to the terms of service you agreed to when buying a ticket for his train which stated that if anyone were to try and attack or rob any staff of the owl express or if any misdoings done to another passenger were to be reported, reviewed and found to be true, any valuables of said offending party would be forfeited as payment for the Conductor having to deal with it. Whether or not he could actually get away with this in court has remained to be seen as most animals stupid enough to try and rob the Owl Express didn’t end up surviving long enough to go to court.
> 
> **The Conductor did not think of himself as greedy, he just knew the chances of getting Shorthair or the cat’s mysterious employer to pay his medical bills or for the damage to the train was as likely as Grooves deciding to shave his head and abandon the studio to become a monk while declaring the virtues of living a simple, quiet, normal life. It just wouldn’t happen.


	9. Rise of the Orange Terror

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Leia is forced to view the remains of the fight scene when the peacock and Mrs. G check out the noise. Mr. Shorthair wakes up.

“Ah, it would seem our associate was indeed killing someone. So sad, blood and feathers everywhere,” the peacock shook his head sadly.

Leia stared at the scene before her in wide eyed horror. She had seen the aftermath of violence on TV and in her dad’s movies but never in person. As Mrs. G pecked at her feet to keep moving forward, Leia slowly became aware of the copper like smell of blood.

Small splotches of red speckled the floor and several streaks of it dripped down the glass panels where someone had hit them hard enough to crack them. Feathers of various colors stuck to some of the spots of blood.

Leia whimpered. The some of the feathers looked like her dad’s.

The peacock walked over to the barricaded room as Leia and Mrs. G stayed back. Making a few nondescript noises under his breath, he walked the perimeter of the fight scene, checking out every bit of broken glass, lost feather and scrap of fur. He picked up a crumpled tinfoil hat.

“Hmm, very interesting. Mrs. G! Take the little one back to the control room and keep her there. I have a feeling we might have a problem with old friend of boss’s, Redd. If so, I may need to find where Shorthair has gone: I would rather not have another bird slaughter on hand.”

Mrs. G honked a question.

“Well yes, he maybe inside room with barricade but he may also be on top of train eating remains of conductor bird. Such is nature of Shorthair,” the peacock mentioned casually.

Leia squeaked and gasped at the same time, covering her mouth with her hands. Her dad couldn’t be dead, right?

The peacock looked over at her, a blank expression on his face.

“Ah right, Little one. Do not worry, we will keep you alive,” he said cheerfully, patting Leia’s head with his wing tips.

Leia flinched back. She was shaking so hard she could barely move.

The peacock smiled again.

“Back to the control room now, like a good little girl,” he said, shooing her and Mrs. G away with his wings.

Leia stood frozen. She wanted to scream at them or cry or or just do something other than stand around!

Mrs. G snapped at Leia’s collar and dragged her towards the door.

“Ah, thank you Mrs. G!” The Peacock called happily as the goose took Leia through the door.

As she was dragged back down the stairs to the control room, Leia was screaming at herself in her head to move, to fight back, to see if her dad really was… Leia gulped. She needed a chance to escape. To run and hide. Now that there was only one, perhaps she could manage it.

Mrs. G dropped Leia for a moment and shook her neck to stretch her muscles. While she was the best goose in the business, dragging anyone using your mouth was a pain. Better to peck at their legs and chase them to where you want them to go.

Speaking of, Mrs. G extended her great wings to herd the little brat. A few hits with the wings usually got the message across and if not, well, Shorthair wasn’t the only one allowed to have fun. She snickered as Leia whimpered and fell to the ground.

Leia, still terrified, felt a new emotion rise up out of the deep choppy waters of fear. It was hot, boiling away all other emotions until it was the only one coursing through her veins.

How dare they?!

Leia got to her feet, shaking with rage.

How dare they treat her and her dad like this?! Acting like they could kill him like it was no big deal? Ha! Like her dad would die so easily! She knew how it went, if you didn’t see a body, chances are they aren’t dead yet. Just like in her dad’s movies, he’d come back just in the nick of time and beat up both the bad birds.

A sliver of doubt tried to wiggle into her raged filled mind but she overruled it.

As for herself, she needed to get away from the stupid goose lady.

Mrs. G advanced on Leia, neck lowered, wings raised high, and hissed loudly in Leia’s glaring face.

Leia’s fist clenched and she punched the goose on the side of the head as hard as she could.

The goose pulled her head back, shaking it to recover but Leia wasn’t having any of that.

With pure fury she hadn’t had since the red dot incident, Leia launched herself at the goose’s neck, biting and scratching with all the rage and terror a small body like hers could muster.

Mrs. G danced around like a ballerina with fire ants in their leotard, honking wildly and trying to buck the biting terror off her body.

But Leia had the jaw of a bear trap and the will of toddler told they weren’t allowed sweets.

The fight continued across the room. Mrs. G crashed into various tables to knock Leia off and Leia smartly shifted her position to Mrs. G’s back to avoid getting hit. She was used to this game.* 

Leia wrapped both arms around the goose’s neck and squeezed.

Mrs. G let out a horse honk and let herself slump down.

Breathing heavily, Leia let go. Shaking, she got off the goose’s back and took a few steps back.

Gasping for air, Mrs. G slowly tried to stand. Her small sunglasses had been knocked off during the fight and her dark eyes glowed red with hate.

Leia didn’t wait for Mrs. G to act. She bolted for the door leading to the other cars. She had been lucky, there was no way she’d manage that again. Best to hide for now.

Leia pushed open the door, half expecting the goose to charge her back before she made it through the door. Not daring to look behind her, Leia bolted towards the luggage room.

Shorthair moaned as he came to. His whole body ached.

_That damn bird_ , the red hot thoughts burned across his mind. _When he got his hands on that stupid bird…_

There was the sound of wood scraping from somewhere behind him. Shorthair’s ears swiveled. Struggling to his feet, he noticed several things at once: one, his hands had been tied behind his back, two his blazer was missing and three, he was trapped in a small room. His blazer was gone. Which meant the shard was gone.

He yeowled in anger.

The scraping noise stopped.

“Ah! Shorthair, so you are in there! How lucky!” The peacock called from the other side of the door.

“Pavlin, where the hell have you been?” Shorthair snarled.

“Oh, out here and there. The train is quite fascinating! The staff is not so useful tho,” Pavlin commented slightly annoyed. “Ah, and the conductor bird has called the police. Very rude.”

Pavlin mentioned this as if it was just an annoying afterthought as if the true issue was just how rude everyone was being to him and his fellow companions.

“WHAT?!” Shorthair screamed.

“Yes, yes, it is all very troubling. But I have Mrs. G guarding the little baby conductor bird as a hostage so I am sure it will all work out,” Pavlin said, clearly not bothered by the situation.

“Oh good, you have that damn bird’s little brat,” Shorthair said with venom in his voice. “She’ll be useful for flushing out the Conductor. Break a few of her fingers, get her to scream over the intercom and that bird will come running.”

Shorthair was grinning his sick grin again, his head pressed up against the door, waiting for Pavlin to let him out. Pavlin could just barely make out his expression through the furniture and glass.

From the safety of the other side of the door, Pavlin shuttered. He was not an easy bird to shake but sometimes Shorthair would say things that would cause ice to shoot down his spine. What was worse was Shorthair meant it and would carry out the threat if given the chance.

“A-ah, so the conductor bird is still alive then?” Pavlin asked, trying to steer the subject away from child mutilation.

“Yes,” Shorthair growled. “But not for long. He’s wounded and once I’m out-”

“Ah, you sound tired,” Pavlin interrupted quickly. “Maybe you should stay in there and rest awhile while I deal with conductor bird. We still need someone to operate the train to our destination after all and I have better track record with negotiation, haha.”

“But you’re not just dealing with the conductor, Pavlin. You have Redd and the other crew members to worry about as well,” Shorthair hissed, steadily thumping his head on the door. His hands were twisting in their bonds, trying to get free. He needed to scratch something.

“Ah, true…”

“Get me out of here, Pavlin.”

“…”

Pavlin stepped back. He had heard about Shorthair’s bouts of bloodlust and every single warning bell in his brain was ringing loud enough to give him tinnitus.

“…Ah, I think you may need some time to calm down. I will come back for you after I have secured the conductor bird,” Pavlin replied sternly, trying to keep his growing fear out of his voice.

“Don’t you even think about leaving me here Pavlin!” Roared Shorthair.

Pavlin forced himself to walk calmly back. No wonder no one else had wanted to take this job; not only did you have to worry about those blasted scientists, you had to keep one eye on your supposed teammate incase he thought it was a good idea to sharpen his claws on your back. He grimaced at the barricaded door. It didn’t look like it was enough.

Everything had wrong for Pavlin. He had a livid cat on his hands and a set of angry birds running around a reality warping train. All of them probably wanted his head on a platter and to make matters worse, there was probably an entire police force waiting for them at Wormwood. Plus, he had no idea how to stop the speeding train.

It was times like these that you had to weigh your loyalty to your boss and the job against your addiction to life and freedom.

The scale tipped when the sound of frantic honking came from the floor below. His heart fluttered in panic.

Pavlin turned and walked out the door, Shorthair’s yells and threats echoing out behind him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *Leia was called the Orange Terror for a reason. It was the same reason no one would babysit her anymore. Most birds prefer to keep their feathers and limbs.  
> ___________________________________  
> We finally get the name of the peacock here, Pavlin! Which is Russian for Peacock. ... I am not clever with names.


	10. Redd and The Conductor

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Redd and the Conductor have a conversation.

The Conductor had dropped Redd’s sleeping form on the small bed in the small room. With great care, he took off his tattered coat and examined the deep claw and teeth marks on his left arm. They looked bad and felt worse. Half-heartedly, he wondered if he’d still be able to fly.

He had never been much of a flier; he always preferred the steadiness of the ground under his feet and the reliable travel of the train over soaring through the air. Even so, he had hoped to teach Leia some of the basics when she was old enough.

…

Leia.

He had heard her scream. That certainty cut through the pink fog of pain in his brain like a knife and his thoughts began to race. The terror the anger had held back before hit him like several sandbags.

He had heard her scream. He’d know her voice anywhere and could tell the difference between her scared scream and her having fun scream. He had heard her SCREAM. Had it sounded a long way off? He had heard it through the vents so it must have come from nearby. It had been a scream of terror, right? His brain wasn’t playing tricks on him, it had to have been. He had heard her scream… and what did he do? Charged at the first target he had thought of. No. He went after the known killer first. Shorthair was the biggest threat to Leia’s safety. Right, but he should have found Leia first and made sure she was safe. Now he was hiding, trying not to bleed everywhere, and keeping an eye on his unconscious brother and that didn’t leave much room to find Leia. Right, but the important bit was he was still alive.

_But was she?_ The Conductor shivered. The thought had arrived unwanted among the choppy other thoughts like a shark through turbulent seas.

Trying to ignore the thought, the Conductor grabbed one of the pillows and removed its case. With a little effort, he ripped the fabric into strips and tried to bandage up his bleeding arm. He had elected to leave his dress shirt on rather than deal with the buttons. It was a rather difficult task to do one handed when you were trying to stop shaking.

After his fourth attempt, he threw the bloody bandages across the room and grabbed another pillow case. He hadn’t noticed the snoring had stopped.

“…Do you want help with that?” Redd’s voice weakly asked.

The Conductor jumped and turned around.

“Redd! Yer awake!”

“Eh, more or less,” Redd mumbled, rubbing the back of his head. He could already feel a large lump forming.

Feeling a mix of both relief and annoyance, the Conductor reached over and smacked Redd hard on the arm.

“Hey! What was that for?!” Redd snapped, rubbing his bruised arm.

“Oh, a lot of things,” the Conductor snapped back. “Ye want tae see the list Ah’ve got going ye scunner? Pretty sure it’s long enough Ah could make it into a novel!”

“Great. Well remind me never to step in and save yer hide again, you ungrateful bampot!”

“Did Ah ask fer yer help? Ah think not, ye tube!”

The two brothers glared at each other, neither daring to break eye contact. The Conductor’s frown wavered and Redd’s face cracked into a smile.

They both started to chuckle.

“Bampot? Really? What, were ye reading Da’s books about the old country?”

“This from the bird who still talks like he hasn’t lived his whole life away from it? Now do you want help with that arm or do you want to bleed out first?”

The Conductor reluctantly moved over to Redd, who winced once he saw how bad the wounds were.

“Holy smoking toledos, how did you manage to carry me with that arm?!”

“Eh, Ah’ve pushed through worse,” the Conductor said casually.

“Really,” Redd said, clearly not believing him.

“Oh aye, Leia puts me through worse daily. She’s a spirited little lass, always causing trouble b- ACK!” The Conductor yelped as Redd tightened a bandage a little too hard over one of the wounds.

“Woops,” Redd said coldly. “You were saying about my little girl?”

The Conductor glare could melt steel beams.

“Ye dinnae get tae call her that, Redd,” he snarled. “Ye gave up that right when ye abandoned her on my train with naw way tae stay warm moments before she started tae hatch.”

“What, I left her a blanket!”

“Ooooh, so that makes it alright then? All that damn thing did was trap her in her egg! If Ah hadn’t found her when Ah did, well, Ah doubt she’d be running around stealing sandwiches when she thinks Ah’m not looking and biting strangers!” The Conductor snapped.

“Well what a fine job you’re doing then,” Redd sneered sarcastically. “She steals and bites others? What a wonderful bird she’ll grow up to be.”

“She’s one!*” The Conductor barked. “How can ye expect an one year old tae understand right and wrong when she still doesn’t understand object permanence half the time! _And ye are nae one tae talk REDD._ ”

The two birds glared, their feathers puffed up in anger. Angry silence filled the small room.

Redd spoke first.

“Do you even know where she is, Conductor?” He spat.

“No, but Ah plan tae find her fast,” the Conductor replied with angry calmness.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *Birds like Redd and The Conductor mature slightly faster than humans before slowing down. While only a year has past since she hatched, Leia is more like a three year old in human years.  
> _____________________________________  
> Bros, am I right? ha ha ha eh eeh ehhhh


	11. Hide and run

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Leia tries to get away from Mrs. G

Leia ducked into the tall stacks of forgotten luggage that forever towered in the luggage room. Running down the rows and rows of suitcases, Leia looked for one she had marked before with a tiny smiley face with jagged teeth.

Finding it wedged at the very end under a collapsed tower of forgotten duffel bags and travel packs, Leia struggled to pull it out from under the mess. With a final yank, she fell backward with the small, cheap suitcase in her arms.

She stood up and dove behind one of the luggage towers just as the door to the luggage was thrown open. The sound of an angry goose echoed throughout the large room and the slow and deliberate footsteps that followed sent dread coursing through her veins.

Leia winced as the footsteps headed in her direction. Holding the small suitcase handle in her beak, she climbed up the tower of suitcases and snuck quietly along the roofs of towers. She stopped whenever Mrs. G stopped and moved when she could hear movement again. If she was careful, she could make it to the second door. From there, well, she’d have to see.

Her hope was to make it to the panic room her dad had set up for her in the creepy screen room. The small room was right above the massive wall of screens and could be double locked from the inside. She hadn’t understood all of what the Conductor had told her about the room, but she had understood the main part: if she was in danger and he wasn’t around, grab the key and go directly to the room. If it was life threatening, press the red button. She probably shouldn’t have left the key in her little suitcase in retrospect.

Hugging the suitcase, she snuck to the door and waited till she heard movement to open it.

There was a rustle of wings unfolding and the sound of wings pumping hard to get airborne.

“Peck,” Leia pipped quietly and reached to opened the door. No use in keeping quiet now. She caught the sight of Mrs. G landing on the catwalk at the far end of the room out of the corner of her eyes. The goose didn’t look happy and charged at full speed.

Leia’s instinct ridden brain screamed to run through the door, her body second the motion while something deep down in her bones told her to jump below. It overrode everything else and her legs moved of their own accord. She jumped to the floor below just as Mrs. G, unable to stop, crashed hard into the solid metal door.

Leia rolled just as she hit the ground and looked up to see a very stunned Mrs. G trying to figure out what had happened. Not waiting for the goose to find her bearings, Leia sprinted out the door and jumped over to the platform that held the door that lead to the screen room.

She wondered if her da would be mad about the big dent in the door; it was a passing thought to keep the terror at bay. She knew he’d be mad at the whole ordeal. And she held onto that. That he was ok and at the end of this would go on a massive yelling tirade that would shake mountains, cause landslides and generally cause all around chaos. No one would be spared from his sharp tongue and sharper beak. And all the while, he’d be holding her cause she’d be latched on to him like a barnacle to a rock.

Leia rushed over the darken room lit only by the static from the many stacked screens. The buzz and hum from the screens mixed with the other clanks and hisses from the train all somehow echoed much more than they ought to in the dark room. Her footsteps were drowned out by the echoes.

Running over to a small hidden panel, Leia punched in a pattern and the small elevator platform next to it shuttered to life. Hopping on, she rose up just as Mrs. G staggered through the door below. Leia willed the elevator to move faster.

As the elevator climbed higher, the goose’s head turned sharply towards the movement. The unfurling of wings took a fraction of a second and the goose was airborne and headed right at where Leia would be in a few seconds.

The goose was fast, and Leia had to admit Mrs. G was faster than she was, but Leia hadn’t run into a door after having her air squeezed out of her by an angry toddler.

Leia wided her stance and swung her tiny suitcase around as hard as she could just as the goose came within range, letting go at the last possible moment.

It was not a well made suitcase. Since Leia had a tendency for destruction, the Conductor had made the wise decision to get her one that could be easily replaced when she eventually wrecked it. As such, it was made up thick cardboard rather than wood and was already falling apart in several areas from the number of times Leia had left something soggy in it or had spilled a drink on its cover. The fake wood texture was peeling and some spots were green with mold. Coupled with the amount of junk Leia had stuffed in it, one good hit would be all it took to break the little thing open like a piñata.

So when the tiny suitcase collided with Mrs.G’s head and she smacked it away angrily with a hard peck from her bill, it exploded and random bits of paper, glitter, crayons, snack wrappers and various shiny odds and ends filled the air like confetti. Two items dropped from the bag like stones: the key and Miss Lambkins.

Grabbing both as she darted around the goose who was choking on bits of paper and blinded by the shower of glitter, Leia jumped off the platform and shot towards the heavy doors. She jammed the key in the lock and twisted it. The door shuttered and opened quickly as the lock fell away.

Running inside, Leia slammed both hands on the two emergency lock buttons on the inside of the doors.

A heavy bullet proof glass panel shot up just as Mrs.G tried charging at Leia again. She bounced off with a heavy thud.

Leia stood and faced the goose behind the glass as the second emergency door started to rise. She made eye contact with Mrs. G and stuck her tongue out while making a gesture she had seen her dad make before.

The doors closed with a heavy thud as the goose opened her bill to hiss silently at the gloating Leia.

Leia stood, shaking, holding the much loved lamb plush against her chest for all the comfort it gave her for a full five minutes. She could hear Mrs. G trying to force the door open but knew it was a lost cause. Eventually, the thuds stopped and there was silence.

Falling to her knees, she started to sob.

“D-Da,” she sobbed through the thick tears as she squeezed the toy. “Ddaa, ‘ere ‘re ye? Ah wanna go ‘ome! Daaaa!”

All alone, the tiny owlet curled into a ball and sobbed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ;_;


	12. Checking in with others

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which we see what Mr. Shorthair is up to. Redd starts acting weird and the Conductor takes action.

Shorthair rammed his shoulder into the closet doors, hoping to damage them enough to expose a nail or a sharp edge, anything to help loosen the damn thing wrapped around his wrists. He muttered constantly under his breath as he repeated slammed his shoulder into the wood.

“Pavlin, the damn coward. He’d regret leaving me trapped like this,” *THUD* “the boss won’t be pleased, not at all.” *THUD* “No, the posh bird will be plucked and fried and have all his damn tail feathers put back in once the boss finds out *THUD* and he will find out.” *Thu-CRASH*

Parts of the wooden door gave way and several sharp bits of bent nails poked through the wood.

“Perfect,” Shorthair grinned. Turning his back, he worked on cutting his bonds.

Everyone on this train was going to pay.

The cheap fabric of the tie cut quickly and Shorthair rubbed some feeling back into his wrists.

_Now to get out of this damn room._

Shorthair walked around the small room. The only two obvious exits were the door and the window.

He examined the window. It was sealed shut.

Ten seconds later a footstool crashed through the window and crashed into the dry landscape. A few moments later, a chair leg knocked the rest of the glass out of the frame.

Hitching his claws to the outside of the frame, Shorthair carefully climbed onto the outside of the train. The wind roared around him as he climbed to the top of the train.

A fiendish grin stretched across his blood caked face as he reached the top of the car.

They would all pay. Pavlin. Redd. The stupid conductor.

And the stupid fools all had shown him the ways he could make them pay so much more dearly than just killing them. Of course, Redd would already know all about that. How wonderful would his face be when he realized Shorthair was going to take away another bird he cared about.

Shorthair had known Redd for far longer than he would have liked and one thing he knew for sure was that Redd was a damn selfish bird. He wouldn’t step in to save another unless there was something in it for him. Or, in the very rare case, if was someone he cared deeply about.

And the Conductor had responded in kind. There was a connection there, even if Shorthair wasn’t sure what it was. He had a way to hurt Redd and he’d damn well make sure Redd knew it.

The other two were easy. You didn’t need to spend much time around Pavlin to know how attached he was to Mrs. G and the Conductor had his little baby girl running around. Hurting them, holding them hostage, slitting that baby bird’s throat, that would bring them to their knees.

Then he’d crash the train. Sure, the shard would be lost in the rubble but, from what he understood, it was a durable little thing. He could always find it again later. The boss would understand.

He cackled an evil little laugh into the dry wind and smoke. They would pay and he would collect like he always did, even if he’d have to freeze some for later.

 

The Conductor pulled his torn up coat on carefully over his bandage arm. He felt wrong if he wasn’t wearing it while running around his train.

“Are you sure that’s a good idea?” Redd asked. He was currently trying to break a leg off of one of the chairs to use as a makeshift weapon.

“Ah donnae expect ye tae understand aboot keepin up appearances, Redd,” the Conductor replied hotly.

“Whatever you say,” Redd shrugged.

The Conductor flinched when he accidentally put too much pressure on one of the wounds.

Redd shook his head.

Ignoring this, the Conductor managed to struggle into his coat. With smug satisfaction, he started to button it.

Redd stared hard at the Conductor’s pocket.

“… What do you have in the pocket there?” He questioned, pointing to the edge of the velvet box, just barely visible.

“Huh? Oh, this? Shorthair had it on ‘em. Ah grabbed it fer compensation,” the Conductor said, digging the box out of his pocket. “Well, actually Ah was gonna give the box tae Leia… are ye alright, Redd?”

It was a superfluous question, something obviously wasn’t right. A change had come over Redd. His face darkened, the features seemed to sink in more than usual. The shadows on his face were much darker and deeper than they ought to be, even in the dimly lit room. And Redd’s expression had changed from his usual mix of trying-to-be-cool and overly stressed out to sharp and dangerously focused.

Redd’s eyes focused on the box hungrily.

“Redd?” The Conductor reached out with his other hand to shake his brother.

Redd flinched away, as if burned.

“Fine!” _**FINE!**_ He snapped. There was an bizzare echo to his voice that buzzed as if made up of thousands of bees the size of grains of sand.

The Conductor’s brow furrowed. Watching Redd’s face, he moved the box around.

Redd’s eyes followed the box desperately, his body tensed up like a cat ready to pounce.

“…Why do ye want this box, Redd?” The Conductor questioned. And why was it so important that it was the only thing Shorthair kept on him?

Redd froze, the shadows on his face growing even darker. The temperature in the room dropped and the ambient noise of the train drained away. Faint buzzing could be heard just on the edge of hearing.

Bone deep instincts told the Conductor to get the heck away from Redd as fast as he could. He overruled them.

“What’s in this box, Rrredd?” The Conductor asked with an annoyed edge to his voice to cover up the fear building up from his bones.

Redd’s mouth open and shut several times in an attempt to answer. Everytime an answer tried to form, he seemed freeze and dismiss it. The buzzing grew louder.

“…Peck this,” the Conductor muttered. Fed up with the whole bizarre experience, he stuffed the box back into his pocket and left the room.

“Wait!” _**WAIT-**_

The door closed softly on the buzzing echo. Standing in the bright light shining through the wall sized window, the Conductor shivered. What was it about the box that made Redd act like that? What the heck was that? Did Redd get mixed up with demons or something?

Fur flashed by the window. The Conductor’s head snapped over just in time to see the tip of a tail pass by the corner of the window.

“Nooooo…. That peck neck couldn’t have…”

Checking to see if anyone was down below, the Conductor jumped down below, carefully walked over to the blocked door and looked through the legs of a battered chair of the barricade. He could just barely make out the jagged glass still in the window frame and the wind whipping the curtains.

“Flocking FLOCK!” The Conductor yelled. He couldn’t wait for Redd to stop being creepy, he needed to find Leia NOW.

Bolting over to the door, the Conductor slammed the door open and stepped out onto the landing.

Pavlin, from the floor below looked up in surprise. His wing was hovering over the doorknob to the door for the other cars.

“Ahh, conductor bird, just the bird I wanted to see-” Pavlin started.

“Save it, Peck Neck! Where’s my lass?!” The Conductor shouted down at him. He hadn’t intended to find one of the peck necks so soon but when life gave you bugs, you made bug juice.

“Aahh, the little one. Mrs. G is taking very good care of her. Very minimal harm is coming to her,” Pavlin said in what he thought was a reassuring way. He turned to face the Conductor and extended his wings as a sign of reassurance and good will.

“Is very preferable to alternative, no?”

“Where. Is. SHE?”

“I will give you details in time, but first we must discuss certain matters.”

The Conductor growled. He didn’t have time for this. He looked around.

Several of the tables were still set for breakfast the early morning trip. Unused dishes were arranged neatly around a small glass candle holder.

Well, they weren’t buzz saws but they’d do.

“You see, Mr. Conductor bird- AWK!” Pavlin squawked as a plate just barely missed his head. There was a crash and Pavlin dove just as more dishes were launched at him.

“Mr. Conductor bird! This is really unreasonable!” Pavlin shouted from under the bar.

“Ooooh yeah? Is it sooooo unreasonable fer a father tae beat eleven kinds of tar outta some birrrrd punk who’s admitted tae having the knowledge of the whereabouts of his wee little bairn? Especially after the daft scunner admitted tae causing the wee babe harm?” The Conductor snarled from above. “If anythin, Ah’m being kind!”

Pavlin glanced around the area before grabbing a bottle from shelf of wine bottles. He could hear a thud and the sound of the stairs creaking.

“You are being rash!” Pavlin yelled as he stepped out to throw the bottle at the Conductor on the stairs.

Only the Conductor wasn’t on the stairs. All that was there was a barrel on its side, about to fall. The Conductor stood behind it, arms crossed and grinning with a foot on top of the wood, ready to give it one final push.

“Oh sh-” Pavlin dropped the bottle and jumped out of the way of the barrel as the Conductor pushed it as hard as he could down the stairs.

The barrel crashed down the stairs and exploded with a shower of seasoned oak and fermented meatballs against the wall of the train. Pavlin covered his head as a disgusting ball of meat bounced off his head.

“Yer paying fer that, Peck Neck!” The Conductor yelled as he jumped from the top of the stairs. Landing hard, he rushed the prone bird.

Pavlin barely had a chance to get to his knees before the Conductor was on him. Moving quickly, he pivoted around and smacked the Conductor hard in the face with his feather train, launching the yellow bird into the wine bottles. Not waiting for the Conductor to recover, Pavlin darted passed him. In one swift motion, Pavlin’s tailcoat came off, spread his wings and launched himself into the air.

“Really sir! We should talk, no, that is not the word… negotiate! We should negotiate! You stop the train, we leave, you get the little one back! A good deal yes?”

The Conductor grabbed bottles as ammo to throw.

“Oh yeah? That easy, eh? Ah doubt it,” the Conductor raised the bottle to throw it at the hovering bird. “Shorthair doesn’t seem the type tae keep that sort of promise.”

“Ahh, well, Shorthair is a very different story- ack!” Pavlin dodged the wine bottle. “Look, look! He has gone blood crazy! But if you stop the train, maybe we deal with him together? He is trapped, yes?”

“No, he’s not,” the Conductor growled reaching around for another bottle. “The damn cat is on the top of the train and Ah have no clue where he’s headed. Now, WHERE IS LEIA?!”

The last line was delivered as a yell as he threw another bottle as hard as he could. Pavlin dove toward the balcony as the bottle spun passed him. Landing gracefully, he spun to face the Conductor.

“What!? He is out?!”

“Why do ye care, he’s on yer side!”

“He is not on any side! You piss him off, he kills you! This is bad, very bad!”

“What the peck did ye do tae piss him off so much?” The Conductor asked as he watched the panicking bird, confused.

“Not let him out of the room.”

“Wait really?!”

“He is a very spiteful animal,” Pavlin spat. “Forget stopping the train, I will find Mrs. G and risk flying off. Better that than waiting for painful death.”

“H-Hold on! Where is Leia! Ye said she was with… Mrs. G?” The Conductor asked, lowering another bottle he had grabbed.

“Yes! I was telling you that! She is in the-” Pavlin’s speech was cut short as a plate shattered over the back of his head. His body jolted for a moment before falling forward with a loud thud.

Redd dropped the remains of the plate onto Pavlin’s back.

“Obnoxious pompous tit,” _**-POUS TIT**_ Redd uttered. The buzzing was back but it was deafened by the Conductor’s rage.

“REDD YE IDIOT!” The Conductor screamed.

“What? He was a threat, now he is not,” _**HE IS NOT**_ the ice in Redd’s voice did nothing to cool the lava of the Conductor’s rage.

“He was going tae tell me where Leia is! How’s he gonna do that unconscious?!”

“There are other ways. The surveillance screens in the control room for one. I know you have cameras everywhere,” _ **EVERYWHERE**_ Redd said stiffly. He walked over Pavlin’s body like it wasn’t there.

The Conductor shivered as Redd approached him. The beaten up bird hadn’t looked very well in the dim light of the room and out in the brightly lit cafeteria, he didn’t look much better. The words ‘walking dead’ popped into his mind, quickly followed by ‘run’.

But this was Redd! The doofus was getting jealous over me raising Leia just 20 minutes ago. What the hell was going on?

Redd stopped a few inches from the Conductor’s face, his eyes glassy. The Conductor took an involuntary step back.

“What are you waiting for, Conductor, let us find Leia. Then we can open that box,” _**OPEN THAT BOX**_ Redd stated before turning and walking robotically towards the control room.

The Conductor stood stunned, staring blankly at the room in front of him. Shorthair had tried to kill him, Leia was missing and possibly hurt, he still had two potential threats on the loose but somehow the bird the scared him the most was his doofy brother. He wanted the world to make sense again.

 

Redd was screaming as loud as he could as he launched himself at the mental walls of oubliette that THEY had dropped him in.

“This wasn’t part of the deal!” He screamed to the trapdoor.

A deep buzzing erupted all around him.

_**YOUR MIND IS A SONG TO US, WE HEAR EVERY THOUGHT AND FEEL EVERY BEAT OF EMOTION. WE HEAR YOU WILL NOT DO WHAT MUST BE DONE. THE TIME FRAGMENT WILL BE OURS. YOU WILL NOT STOP US.** _

“Hold on one flocking moment! We had a deal! You can’t go back on that!”

_**WHY NOT? WHAT CAN YOU DO TO BIND US TO OUR WORD? WHAT A PATHETIC THOUGHT. NOW BE QUIET WHILE WE DO WHAT NEEDS TO BE DONE.** _

The buzzing ceased. Redd glared up at the trapdoor.

“We’ll see about that you microsized pests.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Stuff is ramping up.


	13. Desperate cries

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Leia tries to find a way to stop Mrs. G once and for all. The Conductor tries desperately to contact Leia.

Leia woke with a start. She had cried herself asleep and now felt overwhelming sick. Barely making it over to a corner, she puked up all the food she had stolen. It didn’t smell great but at least she felt better afterward. Rubbing her mouth with the back of her sleeve, she trudged back over to the center of the room where Miss. Lambkins laid.

Plopping down next to the stuffed lamb, Leia tried to remember what she was suppose to do next. She vaguely remembered something about a red button.

“Smthn… Smthn… red button… ‘ast resorrrrt…. Boom?” Leia muttered to herself.

She took off her hat and nibbled the brim. The ‘boom’ part sounded like fun but she wasn’t too sure about the rest of the words. They had sounded important.

Loud scratches from the door made Leia jump. Mrs. G must have come back.

Panicking, Leia looked over at the various consoles. Various buttons, switches and levers stretched over the wall length consoles. Several large screens hung from the ceiling, wires twisting down to the consoles below like vines.

Leia perked up. This looked promising! With Miss. Lambkins in her beak, she climbed up on the tall counter. Struggling a bit to find her balance, Leia looked at all the colorful buttons and tempting switches.There was only one huge problem.

“…so meny red buttons,” Leia whimpered. Most of the buttons she could see were red or various shades of red. There were a few light blue and dark teal buttons and one or two white buttons. She could avoid most of the red ones till she found the one her dad meant.

Still, it was a problem she noticed more and more. Birds would point at a color and call it orange or yellow but the colors they pointed to just looked like shades of red. Even Mista Grooves would call her dad an “yellow migraine” but that didn’t make sense either, unless yellow was just another word for pink. She was still a little fuzzy on the concept of words and their associations to real world objects but that didn’t sound quite right. It was annoying but she wouldn’t let her distract her from figuring this out.

Stuffing Miss. Lambkins down the front of her jacket, Leia dramatically stomped down on a light teal button. Various other buttons blinked on and off, the screens buzzed slightly before blinking on; displaying the room outside and several corridors of the train and several shrill beeping noises started to echo throughout the train.

Wincing, Leia scanned the screens for signs of Mrs. G. Nothing in front of the panic room doors except a small pile of… bags? Small boxes?? Leia squinted and moved closer to the screen. She couldn’t really make out what it was. Ignoring it for now, she scanned the other screens.

There was movement! The door to the engine room slid open and Mrs. G trudged out, dragging a bag behind her. There must have been something heavy in the bag, as the goose stopped every thirty seconds to catch her breath. When she got to the edge of the platform, she carefully grabbed the neck of the bag in her beak and flapped her wings hard. She struggled to get airborne and very slowly rose to the safe room platform. Dropping the bag carefully, she collapsed on the floor, exhausted.

Leia watched the wheezing form of Mrs. G for a few minutes, waiting for her to do something dangerous. The shrill alarm was still ringing out loud and clear.

On the screen, Mrs. G struggled to her feet and waddled over to the bag. Opening it with her bill, she stuck her head inside and pulled out a welding torch, which was still attached to its gas canister. She dragged it over to the pile next to the door.

“Wat?” Leia mumbled.

Mrs. G went back to the bag, rooted around and pulled out some small sticks, a stone and a tiny bag. She ripped a small hole in the bag and dumped a trail of black powder leading to the pile of stuff at the door. She threw the tiny bag on the pile as well. With that, she flew off camera.

Twenty seconds later one of the sticks flew into frame. It sparkled brightly for ten seconds, showering the ground with sparks. None of the sparks landed near the black powdered trail. There was a pause when the last of the sparks died down. A second stick of what Leia was pretty sure were firecrackers flew into frame.

Leia’s young, pyromaniac brain put two and two together to make an explosion of understanding. She looked around at all the different buttons and levers desperately. Surely there was one that could stop the goose from blowing up the door. Like a cage button or a weapon button. Or a laser beam! That’d be cool! Desperately, Leia started dancing across the different shades of teal and pink. Various buzzing noises and clanking noises erupted around her but nothing physical showed up on any of the screens.

Another bright fountain of sparks illuminated a screen. This time, it didn’t die out. The sparks landed on the trail of black powder and a new spark was born. This fresh spark raced along the black track right towards the pile of various explosives.

Leia torn her eyes away from the screen and bolted across the console to the far side of the room. Wedging herself between the edge of the console and the wall, she hugged Miss. Lambkins and braced herself for the explosion.

The piercing alarm broke the tense silence in painful intervals.

FWREEEEEEEE

Leia’s heartbeat filled her ears.

FWREEEEEEEEE

_Maybe there wasn’t enough tae set off the boom?_ Leia thought hopefully.

FWREEEEEEEE

_It should have gone off by now…_

FWREEEEEEEE

_Dare Ah check?_

FWREEEE-

The world filled with violent sound. The force of it shook everything; several screws unscrewed themselves and dropped to the floor, metal panels rattled, glass shattered and several monitors were blown off the wall. Sparks showered down from the broken monitors.

Leia covered her head with her arms as a shower of dust and other debris rained down on her. Her eyes squeezed shut, she waited for the shaking to stop. 

The rumbling silence of the train filled the room punctuated with the occasional clang as a piece of scrap fell to the ground.

Leia risked peeking out from her hiding spot. The doors were still standing but the wall around them and a large portion of the ceiling and floor were gone. She could see the sky passing above and parts of the cafeteria down below. No sign of Mrs. G.

Cautiously, Leia stepped out from behind her hiding spot. Stepping carefully around the pieces of glass and fallen, sparking cables, Leia made her way to the edge of the floor and looked down.

Large pieces of metal and floor had fallen to the floor below, blocking the entrance to the control room. It was a little too far to jump down safely. Not that there was much reason to do so.

Across the gap, the wall of screens had crashed to the ground, covering the floor with a carpet of glass, tubes and wire. Sparks occasionally sprung up from the mess. The other rooms looked relatively untouched but to get there required trekking across a huge mess of shrapnel and wires. If she could fly, getting there would be a different story.

The only other option was to try and leave via the roof. Leia stared up at a passing cloud.

“…No. Maybe red button time,” she muttered to herself. It definitely couldn’t hurt matters.

Leia made her way over to one of the less damaged control panels. Climbing up, she started pressing any button that looked remotely red.

Nothing. Not even a noise. No lights either.

Annoyed, she tried several other colors, stomping on every button as hard as she could.

Still nothing.

Desperately, Leia started flipping every switch, pulling every lever, pressing every button multiple times. She was so distracted by her frantic search for the right trigger that she didn’t notice the soft sound of wings beating the air.

 

The Conductor picked himself off the ground. The shock of the explosion and the proceeding crashes of large sections of train falling had knocked both birds off their feet.

“Angry,” “wrathful,” “infuriated,” all those words were too soft to describe just how beyond pissed the Conductor was. He needed new words to properly explain to the world just how much he wanted everything to **BURN** and for every damn peck neck on this trip to pay. Both figuratively and literally.

“They’re blowing up **MY** train! No one blows up **MY TRAIN BUT ME!*** ” He yelled to the world.

“Indeed. But they have and we are stuck. The door has been blocked,” Redd’s monotone voice said from behind the Conductor. Redd had been examining the door.

“What?!”

“That explosion knocked some heavy metal down right in front of the door. We are stuck,” Redd repeated. “You should give me the box.”

“What does the box have tae do with being stuck?!”

“Nothing but you should give it to me.”

The Conductor gave Redd a suspicious look.

“…No. Ah’m gonna get the security network going so we can see what’s going on out there.”

Watching Redd out of the corner of his eye, the Conductor made his way over to his chair and started messing with the controls. The train was surprisingly still running smoothly. Switching to the security camera feed, he flipped through the different cameras.

Nothing. Nothing. Nothing. Nothing. Static. Static. Cracked but still working!!

The image was messed up from the explosion but he could make out the wreck of the panic room. There was movement. Was it Leia? Shorthair? The goose???

The Conductor tried another camera from the safe room. Static. CAPERS!

Switching back to the cracked camera feed, he watched it carefully. The blurry shape was jumping up and down on the control panel. That ruled out Mrs. G and probably Shorthair too.

“Leia,” the Conductor whispered, his heart thudding against his ribcage.

Reaching over to his handset for making announcements, he cranked the knob on the console till it read the channel for the safe room.

“Leia? Lass? Can ye hear me?”

The figure on the control panel continued to jump on the various buttons on the panel.

“Leia! Come on! Lass do you hear me!”

Still no reaction from the figure.

The Conductor spun out of his chair and ran over to a different panel. Redd watched disinterested.

Pulling out a different screen and number pad, the Conductor spun around to watch the security footage as he dialed the number for the telephone in the panic room. It was a long shot, based on the condition of the room but maybe…

On the security screen, one of the still mounted monitors behind Leia lit up. A little icon of a phone handset appeared and started to vibrate.

“Come on, Lass, hear it an’ turn arou–”

The Conductor stopped. A white shape that could only be the goose had flown into the room.

“…No.”

The white shape landed on the console across from Leia, who had still not noticed the white shape’s presence.

“No…no…”

With a flap of the shape’s wings it launched itself at Leia.

“NO NO NO!!”

Just as the white blob was about to grab Leia, a furry blur dropped down from the roof and bore the white blob to the floor with a painful impact. Bits of glass and wire flew up from the impact. It rested for half a second before jumping up and grabbing a stunned Leia and disappearing upward.

“I would appreciate it if you would stop screaming, Conductor,” Redd said, annoyed.

“HOW CAN YE BE SO APATHETIC!? LEIA- YOUR KID, WAS JUST GRABBED BY THAT MURDEROUS CAT!” The Conductor roared at the unresponsive Redd.

“So?”

“SO?!!!” The Conductor’s anger escalated, reaching atomic wrath. He threw down the telephone, stomped up to Redd, grab his vest and slammed him against the door.

“Ah dare ye tae say that again,” he snarled.

Redd leaned forward, his eyes meeting the Conductor’s hidden eyes. The Conductor could see the dark shadows around his eyes moving under his skin, like snakes.

“What happens to the child is inconsequential. _**GIVE US THE BOX.”**_

The Conductor let go of Redd and stepped back. Redd’s eyes had changed; the white and red draining away to a dark gray. Whatever was possessing Redd jerked his body forward.

The fear and rage battled for control of the Conductor’s legs. Every step back, he felt the anger grow. He had to get to Leia but there was also what was going on with Redd. He couldn’t leave his brother with whatever this buzzing monstrosity was controlling him. But peck did it terrify the feathers off his back.

_**“THE BOX, CONDUCTOR AND WE MAY DEEM IT A WORTHY INVESTMENT TO SAVE THE CHILD”**_ the buzzing voice spewed as the body of Redd lumbered forward, his arm out stretched.

It was precisely the wrong thing to say.

The punch was a picture perfect cross punch, catching Redd’s chin at just the right angle to jerk his head back.

Before he could react, the Conductor took a half step forward, bent his knees, shifted his torso, clenched his other fist and uppercutted Redd right in the stomach, rising a little off the ground as his legs pushed upward as his rotated his body for more power.

Redd’s body coughed and collapsed to his knees, holding his sides as he wheezed and threw up.

The Conductor stepped around him and ran over to a small service window. With a little effort, he forced the window open and pulled himself outside into the violent wind outside of the train.

_**"WAIT-!”**_ The heaving body of Redd cried. The pain in the stomach of the body was getting too much for them to handle. BODIES! What a worthless concept. So many bits and meaty pieces to keep track of. So many urges and needs you had to overrule so it would behave how you needed it to. Pathetic.

“Pfffftttthah ahah hahahahaha!” Redd’s body started to laugh without THEM telling it to.

_**S̨HU͢T͟ ̨̛U͏̧P҉̨̛!**_ They commanded. ҉ _ **WE WILL NOT BE MOCKED BY YOU!**_

“HA HA HA HA HA HA HA!” Redd shouted as sweat dripped down his face from the effort of trying to keep control.

_**SHUT UP!** _

The force of voice flattened Redd to the ground.

“..aha haha ha ha ha,” he said just to spite them.

Deep, invisible buzzing surrounded Redd. Redd closed his eyes and waited for pressure to come back.

_**YOU WILL GET THE BOX! DO IT NOW! NOW! NOW!** _

“Heh. Screaming like a kid again…” Redd rolled onto his back.

_**WHY ARE YOU NOT MOVING?! GET UP! GET UP AND GET THE BOX!** _

“You got me punched in the face and the gut. I’m taking five.”

The invisible swarm buzzed louder. It always did that when it was frustrated or thinking.

_**WHAT̨ ͟ĄB͜OU̕T ̕TH̢E͠ ̢CHILD?͞**_ it asked pointedly, trying a new tactic.

“Oh? Now you care about Leia?!” Redd growled. “I can’t do anything for her if I fall off the train because I tried climbing on the outside of it when my legs felt like jelly and my arms like lead.”

_**…**_ The buzzing died down.

“That’s better. Besides, -! Ugh, The Conductor is out there. I almost feel sorry for Shorthair.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *This is true


	14. On top of the train

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Conductor confronts Shorthair on top of the train.

Wind whipped at the Conductor's battered body as he climbed to the top of the train. His left arm throbbed with waves of pain and stinging hotness. Adrenaline and anger had fueled those punches and now he was paying the price. At least the pain in his arm distracted him from everywhere else that hurt.

With a final painful pull, he collapsed on the roof of the train. Taking a few minutes to catch his breath, the Conductor rested his head on the metal roof.

“Hang in there Lass, Ah’m coming,” he muttered to the warm metal.

How just like a movie that it would come to this. A dramatic showdown on top of a speeding train. Heh, the whole situation would make a decent script once he reworked it a bit.

“This movie better have a happy ending,” he growled. “Ah’m nae rewriting it.”

Pulling himself up, the Conductor steadied himself against one of the decorative metal feathers. From here, he could see the large hole in the ceiling caused from the blast. There was movement from behind some of the ripped metal.

Shorthair was struggling to climb over a twisted beam while holding onto a struggling Leia.

“SHORTHAIR!” He screamed into the wind as he took a running leap over various bits of debris and holes in the train.

Shorthair’s head snapped towards him. In one swift movement, he tossed Leia up in the air and bit into the back of her neck. Turning back to the beam, he scampered up and over it, dragging the whimpering Leia along with him.

The Conductor rolled as he hit the roof in front of the beam. Not waiting a second, he jumped at a different part of the beam, using it as a platform to angle his next jump to launch himself higher. On his way up, he grabbed a loose piece of metal shrapnel. It cut slightly into his hand but it was better than not having a weapon.

Once over the pile of wreckage, the Conductor rolled out of the way of several large pieces of broken train. He then ducked as Shorthair threw several pieces of sharp metal several inches into the wood where the Conductor’s head would have been.

“Tch, ah well. That wouldn’t have been fun anyway, Conductor,” Shorthair’s smarmy voice called out.

The Conductor rose to his feet, scrap metal at the ready.

Shorthair was standing next to several pieces of metal scrap stuck into the train’s roof like arrows into sand. On the roof next to him, crouched down on her knees, with hands covering her head, was Leia. Shorthair had one foot on the middle of her back and a long piece of scrap metal rested pointedly against the back of her neck.

“Take one step further, my dear Conductor, and we’ll both see how far your little darling’s head rolls,” Shorthair said, grinning. “Now drop the weapon.”

“D-ddaa- daaa-” Leia sobbed quietly.

The Conductor, glaring at Shorthair, dropped the scrap metal.

“Verrrrry good,” Shorthair purred.

“Look Shorthair, let’s have a chat,” the Conductor said with forced calmness. “Ye have my Lass and Ah have something ye want. Let’s trade.”

“Really? What could you possibly have-”

The Conductor pulled the velvet box out of his pocket. Shorthair’s pupils grew wide.

“So, ye want tae trade?”

“You stole it! But how do I know the shard is still in there? You’ve been with Redd. He could have taken it and left you with the box. Open it!” Shorthair’s words came out in rapid succession ending with the screaming command.

“Wha- Redd hasn’t touched this box, ye have me word on that!”

“Pfa! Your word is nothing. Open the damn box!” Shorthair put a little pressure on the metal resting on Leia’s neck.

Leia let out a yelp of pain.

“ALRight! Alright, just, give me a second,” the Conductor shouted.

Gripping the top of the box, the Conductor tried to force open the locked box. It didn’t budge. Frowning, he tried twisting it. Stars of pain flashed across his vision as red hot pain ran up and down his left arm. Still, the box remained closed.

“I’m waiting, Conductor. And my arm is getting tired, who knows how much longer I’ll be able to hold this metal up.”

Desperately, the Conductor tried hitting the box against some of the scrap metal. Surprisingly, the box damaged the metal and remained unharmed.

“You have fifteen seconds, fourteen, thirteen…”

 _ _NO NO NO NONONONONO__. The Conductor tried biting it open. Still not a dent.

“Ten, nine, eight….”

__Can Ah bull rush him? No. He’s too far away, he’d kill Leia before Ah’d even touch him. Leia, Ah, Ah’m so sorry..._ _

“Six, five, four…”

Something glinted in the air above the Conductor. A small, silver key hit the ground in front of him. The design looked like the one on the velvet box. The Conductor jumped at it and rammed it into the lock and turned it.

Click

Nestled within some white satin was a small piece of glass, no longer than a toothpick and no wider than a penny. It was slightly curved and when the light hit it, there was a odd blue sheen to it.

The Conductor gaped at it. This was it?! THIS was what this whole thing was about?!! This piece of TRASH?!

“Two, one..”

“HERE! SEE! YER PIECE OF TRASH IS HERE!” The Conductor shouted, showing the open box to Shorthair. “Now put that metal down!”

Shorthair grinned.

“Too bad. You were too late.”

Shorthair lifted the piece of metal just high enough to gain a little extra force before bringing the metal down hard.

The Conductor shut his eyes. He couldn’t do it. He couldn’t bare to see Leia die.

There was a sickening thud and a yowl of pain. The sound of metal hitting the roof let out a deafening clang.

“You can open your eyes, you old softie,” Redd’s tired but playfully mocking voice cut through the darkness.

The Conductor opened his eyes. Shorthair was rolling on the roof with a metal bar sticking through his shoulder. The deadly scrap metal had fallen behind Leia, who was frozen with fear in the same spot she had been in. Redd was standing on the pile of wreckage behind him.

Jumping down, Redd walked over to the Conductor.

“You alright?” He asked, concerned.

“Aye, Ah will be, once Ah get Leia away from that beast,” the Conductor managed. He’d see that scene in his nightmares forever, he just knew it. And it would always happen in slow motion.

“Right.”

The two brothers advanced on the thrashing Shorthair. Redd had a second metal rod and rested it on his shoulder like a baseball bat. The Conductor walked with the box in hand, the satin cloth in the other. The wind, knowing its visual role in these sorts of matters, made sure their tattered clothing where caught in the air just right so it was dramatic and visually pleasing.

Shorthair managed to pull the metal bar out of his shoulder just as the two brothers stepped between him and the trembling form of Leia.

“Do you think you’ve won, you disgusting feathered pests?!” He spat. “The boss will find out and you will be marked!”

“Ehh, I’ve been marked by that bloated pheasant for years. Big whoop. Nothing either of us can't handle,” Redd retorted, brushing off the threat quickly.

“Ehehehehehe, coming from you Redd, that's-” The metal rod hit Shorthair hard in the side, sending him flying back towards the pile of wreckage.

“Hmm? Sorry, I can't hear you now that you're waaaaaay over there.”

“Nice hit. Glad yer on my side now. Just don’t go getting all possessed on me again,” the Conductor half joked.

“Eeeh, give me a few minutes. I donno how long I’ve got till they come back,” Redd said through a forced grin.

“Ah was joking.”

“I'm not,” Redd said dead serious, his eyes never leaving Shorthair, who was listening intently to their conversation. “Grab Leia, give me the shard, and get outta here. That's all they want anyway.”

“Aaha aha ah! What LIES are you spouting this time Redd?!” Screamed Shorthair. “You’ve killed for those things, just as I have! You aren’t collecting them for some master like a dog, you want the power! Same as the Boss!”

Shorthair turned to the Conductor.

“If you had any sense, my dear Conductor,” Shorthair breathed heavily, blood dripping through his mad grin, “you’d kill the both of us and keep the time shard for yourself.”

Redd’s grip tightened on the metal rod. He was terrified to look at the Conductor. For years now, he’d been keeping his criminal activity as far away from his family ears as possible. To have Shorthair blurt that out now, when he needed his brother to trust him… He risked looking over.

The Conductor was kneeling down by Leia’s trembling form, one hand on her head, gently stroking it. He could hear him whispering comforting words to the terrified owlet.

Leia raised her head, tears in her eyes. There he was! Just like she knew he’d be. She tried to open her mouth to say something but all that came out was one long sob.

The Conductor gently whipped away some of the grime and blood from her face as the river of tears poured down her face.

“It’s alright Lass, Ah’m here, Ah’ve got ye,” he cooed as he wrapped her up in a deep hug, ignoring the pain in his arm.

“CONDUCTOR! DIDN’T YOU HEAR ME!” Shorthair bellowed.

The Conductor stood up, Leia cradled in his left arm, bawling into the nook of his neck.

“Aye, Ah heard ye.”

“WELL?!”

“Oh Ah was wait fer ye tae tell me somethin Ah didnae ken,” he replied calmly. “And if the two of ye really want this piece of trash so much, Ah’d much rather ye both kill each other somewhere else!”

With that, he hurled the box as hard as he could off the side of the train.

“NO!” Three voices screamed at once.* 

Shorthair took a bounding leap off the train after the box in desperation, Redd almost followed but was tackled to the ground by the Conductor carrying Leia.

In midair, Shorthair caught the box and grinned madly. Scratching at the lid as he fell, he managed to open it just as he hit the ground.

It was empty.

His smile froze.

Shorthair’s body hit the ground with immense force and rolled into the deep ravine that ran throughout the Deadbird desert.

The train moved on.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *One of the voices made up of thousands of small buzzing ones.


	15. Last bits of clean up

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Last ups and downs of this roller coaster

Redd screamed in a voice not his own.

_**“YOU FOOL! DO YOU KNOW HOW LONG IT TOOK TO FIND A PIECE THAT SMALL?!”** _

“Calm down whatever the heck ye are!” The Conductor ordered, sitting in the middle of Redd’s back so he couldn’t get up. Leia was curled up in his lap, still shaking and holding on tightly.

_**“WE WILL NOT BE CALM!”** _

“Yesh, yer like a babe screaming for a sweetie. Now, let me talk tae Redd.”

_**“NO! THAT FOOL HAS COST US TOO MUCH! HE THREW THE KEY! HE DIDN’T TAKE THE TIME FRAGMENT WHEN YOU HAD IT RIGHT IN FRONT OF HIM! HE IS A WORTHLESS FOOL!”** _

“Eh, Ah’ll give ye the fool part, but Ah’d say he’s far from worthless. So he threw the key tae me? He cut it a little close then. So Ah take it ye cannae sense these, whatchamacallit, ‘time fragments’ then?”

_**“…”** _

“Oh donnae be like that, if ye could, ye would have ken that Ah’ve got that fragment thingy right here.”

With that, the Conductor pulled the satin cloth out of his pocket.

The effect was immediate. With unexpected force, Redd bucked the Conductor and Leia off his back. The two landed hard and the Conductor pushed Leia off of him just as the possessed Redd tackled him. One of Redd’s hands grabbed the Conductor’s throat and started to squeeze while the other scratched at the cloth in the Conductor’s clenched fist.

Leia shook as she stood up. The semi-nice bird was attacking her da! No no no!! Anger and terror launched Leia at the back of Redd’s head, biting hard.

The possessed body yelled and clawed at the biting bird. Seeing his chance, the Conductor threw the shard weakly away from both him and Leia.

Redd grabbed Leia and threw her at the ground just as the piece of glass bounced underneath her.

Owlet and shard collided.

There was a blinding flash of light and Leia was gone.

 

Darkness enveloped everything. Sound was sucked away and each breath was laborious. Leia checked to see if her eyes were open. Yep. Just darkness. She felt around her. She was floating on something smooth, that she could tell. And her back hurt, a lot.

Her ear twitched. Was that a sob? Sound was so muffled here it was hard to tell.

“..ello?” She meekly called out. The darkness sucked up the word.

Leia tried standing, her floatation device wobbled dangerously below her.

“ELLO?!” She shouted into the void. Heavy silence answered her.

Shivering, Leia tried to sit down. The extra movement shook whatever she was floating on just enough that it flipped over, sending Leia into the dark water.

Only, it wasn’t water.

“Sand?!” Leia coughed as she tried to grab onto something to keep her a float.

The dark sand pulled her down fast, dragging her deep into its depths. Leia covered her mouth and tried not to panic. This had to be a dream or something!

Down deeper and deeper she went, feeling the currents spin her different ways, always pulling her towards one central point.

Her lungs ached for air but trying to breathe in this would result in lungs full of sand. Finally, her body felt like it was being pushed through a small tunnel and the world in front of her closed eyelids exploded with light. She could feel dry air on her face and she gasped for air.

Leia then promptly choked on sand still in the air. Gagging hard, she opened her eyes and saw an ocean of sand. She was falling, only, very, very slowly. Looking around, she saw that the ocean was encased in a glass bubble like structure.

“Whaa ACK *cough* *gag*”

_Now why are you here?_ A voice comprised of millions asked.

Leia looked around for the source of the voice.

“Ello?”

_Leave this place. Go on. Shoo._

There was a flash of blinding blue light.

 

“-And then Ah’d bring ye back tae life just so Ah can do it all to ye AGAIN! Ye got that ye PECK NECK!”

_**“WE ARE NOT ALIVE…”** _

“Well guess what?! **That won’t matter.** ”

Leia blinked. Clouds passed in the sky above her and the train rumbled below her. She gingerly sat up and winced in pain. Her back was still in a lot of pain. Reaching around, she touched the source of the pain. There was a hole in her jacket’s fabric and she could feel that some feathers were missing but there wasn’t a cut or anything.

She sniffed and started to cry. It had been too long of a day and she just wanted to go home and sleep.

The bickering in the background stopped.

“LEIA!!? OH LEIA!”

Leia was scooped off the ground and hugged tightly to the Conductor’s chest.

“Oh my little lass. Y-yer back! Ye disappeared and- and- that Peck Neck said ye were gone but yer here!” The Conductor buried his face into Leia’s shoulder. 

“Ah thought Ah lost ye,” his voice started to crack.

“D-daaaaa!” Leia sobbed wrapping her arms around the Conductor’s beak.

Redd’s expression flickered. The grey possessed eyes flashed their normal red and for a moment, his expression was a mix of pained acceptance and sadness.

“Did ye just- wait, ye said it before too didn’t ye?” The Conductor asked, his voice slightly muffled from Leia’s hug.

Leia let go of his beak and nodded her head, tears still falling down her face.

Tears welled in the hidden eyes of the Conductor. His heart was full of so many different emotions; happiness, sadness, relief, anger… Right, anger.

Hugging Leia to him, the Conductor turned around to face the possessed Redd.

“Look, whatever ye arrrreeeee where did ye go?”

The top of the train was empty, Redd was nowhere to be seen.

“Redd!” The Conductor yelled out to the sky.

The word echoed out across the desert. No response.

Leia tugged at the Conductor’s ripped sleeve.

“Inside now?”

“…Yeah Leia, let’s go back inside. We’ve got the last of the riff-raff tae clean up.”

“Bad birds?”

“Yep, gotta throw them in jail.”

“Oh! Unk Geghghg!”

“Pfft, that’s right, Unk Geghghgh.”

“Canna bop them?”

“Why do ye want tae hit them?”

“Hurt me,” Leia said, tears welling up in her eyes again.

The Conductor’s expression darkened.

“Oh in that case, let me lend ye a hand then,” he growled, cracking his fists. “After all, ye are part of me staff. And these peck necks did agree tae my terms of service.”

A dark smile crossed his face as they both descended back into the train.


	16. Gregg returns

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Gregg waits for the train to arrive and braces for the worst.

Gregg paced back and forth outside Wormwood station. He was dressed in a dusty green conductor’s outfit. A large number of C.A.W agents watched nervously as he muttered to himself.

They had reports from animals out in the desert about explosions coming from the railroad tracks. Gregg had tried to get in touch with the train conductor to confirm or deny the reports to no avail. This caused their normally rational Captain to freak out. He had the entire department on full alert. Everyone had to mobilize at this very second. No one was allowed to bow out. He needed everyone at the Wormwood station five minutes ago! And so on and so forth.

Now there were emergency vehicles on standby, everyone was in riot gear incase the criminals tried to attack, and Captain Gregg was pacing while smoking his tenth cigarette. It was a rare sight to behold; Gregg rattled to the core.

There was the faraway sound of a train whistle. Gregg stopped pacing and ran over to the entrance to the station. Taking the stairs five at a time, he rushed down to the train’s platform.

The Owl Express trudged into the station, brakes squealing loudly. Large portions of the top of engine were heavily damaged, several broken windows littered the front cars and the roof had bits of metal sticking out at odd angles.

“What the flocking peck HAPPENED?!” Gregg yelled, forgetting that he was supposed to be calm and collected.

“Oh Gregg! Good, yer here!” The Conductor’s head poked out of one of the broken windows.

“Conductor! Are you- There were- WHAT HAPPENED?!”

“Look, Ah’ll give ye the whole story in a bit but we’ve got some prisoners ye probably need tae take fer their own safety.”

“Wh-what?” Gredd asked, confused.

 

Leia glared at the tied up Pavlin and Mrs. G, the tip of the fireworks pointed directly at the two bound birds. Leia and the Conductor had surrounded the two birds with rows and rows of fireworks and had rigged it so all it took to set them off was for Leia to press one button. And Leia had been waiting for them to make one wrong move so she could press it. She would be fine, since she was protected by the bullet proof glass, but they would go boom.

“Ye see, they tried tae take her captive and she did nae take well tae that,” the Conductor explained casually.

“So you let her set up a DEATH TRAP?!”

“Ach, no, Ah made sure to cut the charge on the explosives, they’d just singe a few feathers. It’s all about helping her feel better, you ken,” the Conductor explained.

“Nope. None of this. Leia, give me the button.”

“No!”

“Leia, now!”

“NO! Daaaaaa!!”

“Eheh heh, Leia, we’ve had our fun, now it’s time tae listen tae Gregg,” the Conductor chuckled, his heart still soaring whenever Leia called him ‘Da.’

Leia pouted and handed the activator over to Gregg.

Gregg’s eyes narrowed.

“Is Leia hurt? It looks like she has blood on her neck.”

“Oh aye. She got attacked by that goose and then by Shorthair. Ah patched her up the best Ah could-” The Conductor stated in a dreamy tone.

“THEN WHY HAVEN’T Yo-” Gregg stopped short. For the first time since he boarded the train, he really looked at his brother.

Torn clothes, dark spots on a black jacket, loss of feathers across his face and… was he swaying?

Gregg cautiously reached out and touched his brother’s shoulder.

The Conductor fell straight back and would have crashed to the ground if Gregg hadn’t grabbed his arm and pulled him up right.

“Med unit, I need a stretcher in here stat! B and C unit, I want you to my position now. We’ve got two for jail and a possible third still on the train,” Gregg yelled into his handset.

Leia tugged on his coat.

“Ah go witf da?”

“… Yeah Leia, let’s get you in there with yer dad.”

“Wha abou other owls?”

“What other owls?”

Leia explained about the tickets and the two express owls on the train.

 

Steve and Jim had spent several fruitful hours getting very drunk while looking for jobs in the sauna*. They had been napping peacefully when the sudden stop of the train woke them up.

“Wzzat? We’re here?” Jim murmured, still very drunk.

“Sssshushshsh, is just Woormwood. We- we’ll be mmmoving very soon,” Steve drunkenly replied.

“Oah okays.”

The two drunk birds fell back asleep.

They didn’t wake up when someone opened the door, nor when the bird walked over to them. They did, however wake up when said bird turned on all the faucets to cold and drenched them in freezing cold water.

Sputtering and cursing, the two owls looked up at the peck neck who dared tried that stunt. They froze.

Towering over them was a tall, dark reddish brown bird wearing a green conductor’s uniform. His eyes glowed a dark red as he glared down at the two cowering owls, his expression saying that even touching them was beneath him.

“Get out.”

Steve and Jim bolted for the door, there was no disobeying that voice.

Gregg glared at the retreating owls. He’d get their information from the Conductor. If he ever saw them near his niece again, there would be trouble for them.

 

 

* this mostly consisting of saying ‘I bet-I bet I could be a bee thingy if I wanted to’ or something along those lines.

 

 

The Conductor floated in a sea of white. Pain seemed a long way off as did the events of the past few hours. He closed his eyes and floated with the current.

“…aa?”

His brow furrowed.

“Daaaaaa?”

The sea grew turbulent.

“Hmmm… laa laa ba ab la al laa la al,” a little voice sang softly.

White waves calmed and he felt something soft touch his forehead.

“La lad da da,” the little voice sang as his forehead was patted.

Whiteness engulfed everything, even the soft song and the Conductor woke up.

Leia had climbed up on his hospital bed and was resting on a pillow next to his head. Her stuffed lamb, newly cleaned of any blood he noted, was resting on his forehead. She was still singing her little made up song and softly patting his forehead.

“Lass, what are ye doing?”

Leia didn’t stop.

“Singing! And patting.”

Leia had been patched up, new bandages were wrapped around her neck and head and she was sporting a little hospital gown.

“Leia, how long have Ah been asleep?”

Leia looked up at the ceiling, chewing on the neckline of her gown.

“Three days!” She said proudly.

“What!” The Conductor shot up. Leia rolled down to the foot of the bed, giggling.

“Leia, has it really been three days?!”

Leia chewed on the gown again, avoiding the Conductor’s gaze.

“Leia,” the Conductor grumbled.

“It’s been three hours, not days,” Gregg said from the door. “You really need to teach her how time works.”

“Noted,” groaned the Conductor, laying back down.

“I’ve got my agents combing the desert for Redd and Shorthair. The other two we have in custody,” Gregg started, walking into the room and sitting down.

“Wow, right to it then,” said the Conductor dryly.

“Yes right to it! You were seriously injured today! The train has a hole in it!”

“Well, ye don’t have tae worry about Shorthair. He took a fast dive off a speeding train. Ah doubt he’s still kicking.”

“Ok, but what about Redd?”

“Wait, how did ye know Redd was on the train?”

“I’m a psychic,” Gregg said sarcastically. “Come on! I have eyes and two witness in jail, what do you think?!”

“…Well, Ah have no clue where he went. One moment he was there, the next, gone.”

“Is that what you’re going with?”

“It’s the flocking truth!”

Gregg groaned and rubbed his eyes.

“Look, I know you two still somewhat get along. I mean, heck, you’re raising his-”

“OI! Shut it!” The Conductor snapped. Both birds’ eyes went to Leia.

Leia returned their stares, confused.

“All I’m asking, from one remaining brother to another, don’t keep stuff about Redd a secret from me. I can help.”

“Yeh, well, Ah doubt that. Ah doubt any of us can help Redd with what he’s dealing with.”

“You’re really not gonna tell me are you?”

“Ye wouldn’t believe me if Ah did.”

Tense silence descended between the brothers.

“One last thing, Conductor,” Gregg said, breaking the silence.

“Yeah?”

“The emergency staff found something weird in Leia’s back. They have no clue what it is or how to remove it.”

“…What.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I love Gregg. He loves his family but has trouble showing it. Doesn't stop him from tormenting his niece's bullies tho.


	17. Home

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Heading Home

There was a flip of a switch and pale blue light shown through the x-rays. Or, they looked like x-rays but half way down, the image became distorted, twisting and turning the image and light at odd angles.

“You see, we can’t tell what it is. The machine was working fine before and we tested it after and it produced perfectly fine images. It’s got to be something in your daughter. Only, we can’t tell what,” a squat brown owl explained.

“When we looked for an entry point, we found only one spot but the only sign there was a wound at all was red skin and the loss of feathers. Since you are her father and you were unconscious, we turned to your brother for what to do next,” a second brown owl chimed in, she was taller than the first owl.

“He gave us permission to remove the anomaly however, there was a problem. Anytime one of our tools got close to your daughter’s skin, and I know this sounds far fetched, the tool would rapidly decay,” the first owl finished.

The Conductor stared at the two owls.

“What.”

“Conductor, I know it sounds weird but I saw it happen too,” Gregg interjected.

The Conductor looked from Gregg to the owls.

“Well, is she okay? This weirrrrrd thing isn’t happening tae her, right?”

“As far as we know, she’s perfectly healthy! There’s no strange cell break down around the red area, in fact, we were lucky to notice the wound at all! Minutes after we identified where this anomaly was, the feathers grew back! The whole area looks like nothing happened! But, it seems it only applies to the one area,” the taller owl explained. “The wounds around her neck and head are not affected at all.”

The Conductor took a deep breath.

“Alright, she can leave when Ah leave then?”

“What?!” The doctors exclaimed.

“Well ye said she’s fine. If the weird thing isn’t causing her no harm, then Ah cannae see spending the money tae keep her here.”

“You can’t be serious!” The short owl yelled.

“He is,” Gregg sighed. “I’ll get your information and we’ll give you a call if anything happens.”

“Not that anything will,” the Conductor snapped. “My lass will be fine, now if ye don’t mind, Ah’m gonna see when Ah can get out of this money trap.”

 

The Conductor stomped back to his room to find Leia waiting for him on the bed, tears welling up.

“Da!” She pipped happily, wiping away the tears.

Anger melted away and the world softened. Scooping her up and ignoring painful protests in his arm, the Conductor hugged Leia tightly. Leia giggled and hugged him back.

“Ye’ll be fine,” he muttered. “Ah’ll make sure of it.”

 

 

Through the power of being too much of a headache to keep around and not sick enough to force him to stay, the Conductor and Leia were released from the hospital later that night. Gregg drove them home in his beaten up old car grumbling the whole ride.

Before they had left, the Conductor had made one essential call so that when they arrived at the small house he had bought for him and Leia to stay in, two huge pizzas were just pulling into the driveway.

That had earned him a look of admiration from Gregg.

“That was some amazing timing,” Gregg said, impressed.

“It’s a gift,” the Conductor bragged opening his door and stepping out to pay the delivery bird.

“Ye want some? Ah ordered two incase ye wanted tae spend the night.”

“I will take a few slices but I have to decline staying the night. I’ve got a lot of work ahead of me. You know how much paperwork you just generated? Gonna be a long one.”

“Eh, fair.”

“Good night, Conductor.”

“Night Gregg.”

“Nite nite! Geghghgh!”

“…It’s Gregg, Leia.”

“Greck!”

“…Good night Leia.”

Gregg’s car sped away into the night. Leia waved at it till the taillights disappeared from view. Lowering her arm, she walked slowly over to the Conductor. He was trying to hold the two pizza boxes and open the front door while not moving his left arm anymore than he had to.

Leia bumped his hand with her head.

“Ah Leia! Could you either hold these or open the door. Ah can do one but not both-”

Leia grabbed his tattered coat and dug her face into it. Her shoulders began to shake. Sobs came next.

The Conductor stroked the feathers on her head.

“Ah ken Lass, Ah ken,” his own tears rolled down his cheeks.

Putting the pizzas on the ground, the Conductor opened the door, Leia still clutching at his coat. Scooting the food inside with his foot, the Conductor pushed the door shut with a click.

Home at last. Now they could heal.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is it! Except for the very short epilogue which I'll post tomorrow.


	18. Epilogue

Shorthair pulled his aching body out of the river. The nice bit about being a cat were those lovely extra lives. He heaved as he slumped into a wet pile of soaked fur and blood onto a small rock bank surrounded by the raging rapids of the river. The dark night sky was barely visible above, littered with thousands of stars.

Oh his revenge would be bloody and legendary. Perhaps even televised, just to rub the salt into the wounds of that damned conductor.

Rolling into a ball, Shorthair tried to rest.

The white water around the rock roared as Shorthair snored. Here and there, flashes of black and pink mixed in with the white water. The roar of the water grew louder, the white waves bashing themselves against the rock unrelentingly.

A flash of black light erupted from underneath the rapids.

Slowly, a long, thin, black bone arm rose from the rapids, unaffected by the rough waters. The tips of the finger bones scratched at the rock, catching onto small cracks in the rock. The arm slowly pulled a moldy cloth draped form from the water. A second black bone arm extended from the white water, reaching at the cat’s sleeping form.

Shorthair felt something chilling dig deep in his back. Hissing loudly, he twisted around, clawing and kicking at his attacker. Claw met supernatural bone with a horrible screeching noise.

The thing didn’t flinch, it just continued to pull the struggling cat towards it, slowly, letting the dread build.

Seeing his attacks having no effect on whatever the thing was, Shorthair dug his claws into the rock in a futile effort to keep himself from being dragged into the water.

His claws created grooves in the rock as the monster pulled him closer and closer to itself.

“No! NO! YOU CAN’T-” Shorthair yeowled

The second bone hand grabbed Shorthair’s body and pulled. Both monster and cat fell back into the rapids.

The white crests of the waves washed over the rock, taking the shards of rock torn up from Shorthair to the bottom of the river.

The river roared on.

Somewhere, far downstream, where the waters were much calmer, a tall figure wearing a moldy old coat emerged from the river and disappeared into the night.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The official end of the Redd story! You can check out https://birb-and-bairn.tumblr.com/ for cute comic and ask questions to the characters. There will be a follow up story coming soon


End file.
